Grandma Got Run Over By A MOAB

The grandmother of leftist Rashida Tliab – the ugliest person ever to serve in Congress – asked her “god” to ruin President Trump after Clayface decided not to go see her in the make-believe territory of “Palestine.”

Democratic Michigan Rep. Rashida Tlaib’s grandmother had some harsh words for President Trump after Israel denied her granddaughter entry because it was allegedly discovered the group funding her trip had members with ties to terrorism.

“Trump tells me I should be happy Rashida is not coming. May God ruin him,” Muftia Tlaib told Reuters in an interview on Saturday.

Well Muftia – if that is your real name – your “god” already has a bad habit of ruining the lives of free people around the world, amirite??

Israel had originally granted Tlaib a humanitarian visa to visit her elderly grandmother, but the Michigan Representative turned it down and went on to claim she was being treated like a criminal and silenced.

So this despicable anti-Semitic piece of flotsam whined about how the Jooooos were keeping her out of Israel, then when they allowed her entry, sudden;y she doesn’t want to go? Hmm, it almost sounds like this was a publicity stunt all along.

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Miranda Is The Perfect Name For Her

Meet Miranda Perez of Palm Beach County, Florida.

Miranda loves her children, so much so that she allegedly threatened to shoot up her children’s school because it was about to be rezoned.

Investigators say a Florida mother was so upset that her children were rezoned to a new school that she threatened to shoot up the new school just as the new academic year is beginning.

Palm Beach County Sheriff’s officials say they arrested 28-year-old Miranda Perez Sunday on an intimidation charge for threatening a mass shooting.

News outlets reports a friend called authorities after video chatting with Perez. He told deputies Perez was upset over the rezoning to relieve overcrowding at their old school. (H/T – JF – 911)

If nothing else, that mug shot is perfect. The pouting face is a cross between Gary Coleman’s, “What you talkin’ ’bout, Willis?” and “I don’t know nothin’ about shooting no babies!”

Sunday Services

As Penance for writing awful things about Peter Fonda, today’s services will revolve around his gorgeous daughter, Bridget.

Bridget Jane Fonda (January 27, 1964) is an American actress. She is known for her roles in The Godfather Part III (1990), Single White Female (1992), Singles (1992), Point of No Return (1993), It Could Happen to You (1994) and Jackie Brown (1997). She is the daughter of Peter Fonda, niece of Jane Fonda and granddaughter of Henry Fonda.

Bridget was great in Point of No Return and Singles. Classic film. There are more photos below the fold…

Continue reading “Sunday Services” →

Peter Fonda Dead

Peter Fonda, star of the 60’s film “Easy Rider,” and nothing else worth remembering, has passed away at the age of 79.

Actor Peter Fonda, who was best known for the 1960s counterculture classic “Easy Rider,” has died at age 79.

Fonda helped to write and produce the 1969 biker film and starred in it with Dennis Hopper. It instantly became a lasting symbol of the 1960s counterculture.

His family says Fonda died Friday morning at 11:05 a.m. at his Los Angeles home, surrounded by family members. They said the cause of death was respiratory failure due to lung cancer.

While many people will remember Fonda from “Easy Rider,” I will always remember the time he attacked an 11-year old boy.

“We should rip Barron Trump from his mother’s arms and put him in a cage with pedophiles and see if mother will will stand up against the giant a–hole she is married to. 90 million people in the streets on the same weekend in the country. F—,” Fonda wrote in a tweet, which has since been deleted.

Yes, I know; “If you have nothing nice to say, blah, blah, blah.” F**k him, he’s dead. Good riddance.

Max Headroom Lives!

A Virginia man has been leaving classic televisions on people’s porches in Virginia. There is no word if the TV is able to broadcast episodes of Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons or Beavis and Butt-Head.

A man wearing a custom television helmet has left over 50 old TVs on porches in Henricho County, Virginia under the cover of darkness.

Several of his special deliveries were caught on home security cameras, but the man has not been identified and police suspect it’s just a prank and that all the televisions (which have already been rounded up by authorities) will not turn on simultaneously and start broadcasting Television Head’s list of demands or he’ll destroy all TV streaming services.

This guy shouldn’t be hard to find. I mean how far can he go if his head is connected to a five-foot cord?

Ol’ Man River…

Meet Tobias Hartsfield of Bettendorf, Iowa.

Tobias doesn’t approve of Iowa summers, so he tries to keep cool by sailing on a barge… in the nude.

On Sunday officers responded to a report of a naked man who was on a barge. Police have identified that suspect as 43-year-old Tobias Hartsfield.

Police say Hartsfield took a boat from the marina and floated it to the I-74 Bridge construction area.

Hartsfield then got onto a barge and untied ropes, causing the barge to shift according to police. A tow boat was called in to move the barge back.

Police say Hartsfield went back to the stolen boat and then was taken into custody. (H/T – Ronni)

Luckily Tobias didn’t fall into the Mississippi. or else he would be suffering from “shrinkage.”

True Detective Stories

I think it’s safe to say this has been a rather terrible week, and I hate to keep bringing up Wednesday’s shooting, but if I didn’t rant about this, I’d go insane.

Well, more insane.

Yesterday I stopped at the local Wawa – it’s a convenience store – for some drinks for work. (Sadly, not of the alcoholic variety.) I’m dressed in a shirt and tie, khakis, my badge is on my belt and my service weapon is holstered on my left side. While walking from my car to the store, a man yells out, “I’m getting kinda concerned with that open carry.”

Now considering the events of Wednesday night, I was in no mood for a large-mouth ass. I kept walking and said over my shoulder, “Really? I’m kinda concerned six of my coworkers were shot last night.” The jackass was behind me and asked, “Oh, are you a cop?”

Me, sternly, “Yeah, the badge on my belt shoulda told ya.”

The bloated skin-sac then felt the need to follow me into the Wawa, and tell me how great police officers are, how hard my job is, and how it was a shame those officers were shot. I replied with little more than random “Uh huhs.” The sac stood behind me in line as I was checking out, still flapping his gums, when I finally had enough.

“Look sir, I’ve had a very bad couple of days. If you want to save yourself from future embarrassment, most armed criminals don’t wear badges, dress in shirts and ties, or keep their firearms in holsters.”

Seriously, why can’t people just leave me alone?

So, This Is Happening

The citizens of Philadelphia have decided they will organize a “Free Maurice Hill” march tomorrow evening. For those of you who are unaware, Maurice Hill is the “man” who fired at countless Philadelphia police officers Wednesday evening, and shot six. Hill has a lengthy criminal record, but the people of Philadelphia will be spending their Friday evening calling for his outright release.

I hate this town. I hate its people.

Something Smells Fishy

Meet Emily Riemer, the “World’s Sexiest Angler.” Emily has more than enough bait to catch men, but she usually deploys it to catch fish.

Emily Riemer is known as the ‘World’s Sexiest Angler’ and one look at her Instagram account will explain why.

The extreme fisher, who hails from Miami, regularly hauls in monster catches weighing upwards of 100kg, all while clad in teeny tiny bikinis and with her blonde mane perfectly in place.

Her skimpy swimwear has helped the sometime model build her 135k Instagram following, but Emily maintains that she is the reel … er, we mean real deal.

“I go fishing in bikinis not to look cute but because it is practical in the heat around Florida and the other places I fish,” she explained to The Sun last year.

Mental note: check home prices in Florida. I wonder what size worm she prefers? Do you think Emily enjoys a sturdy rod? How good is she at bobbin?

(Sorry, but I really needed a post to take my mind off yesterday.)