Meet Jacqueline Eide of Omaha, Nebraska. Now, I realize there are insufficient entertainment options in Nebraska, but one would think this drunken idiot could find something more enthralling than breaking into a zoo and petting a three-legged tiger.
A woman allegedly snuck into an Omaha zoo after hours Sunday morning and was bitten by a tiger when she tried to pet it. Jacqueline Eide, 33, was believed to have been intoxicated when she and a friend snuck into the Henry Doorly Zoo, the Omaha Police Department said.
Police were called to the Creighton University Medical Center regarding a patient who “was very aggressive” and non-cooperative.
Eide had made “unauthorized entry” into the zoo and reached into a tiger’s cage to pet it when the tiger bit her, causing severe injuries to multiple fingers on her left hand, and was then transported to the hospital by her friend. (H/T – Kari)
The friend being the one who most likely goaded this bint into petting a f**king tiger in the first place. Apparently this inebriated imbecile never learned you catch a tiger by its toe, bot its razor sharp fangs.
Oh well, you gotta hand it to Jacqueline; she really has a personality you can seek your teeth into.
The O.K. Corral 
Her mother must be proud.
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Henry Doorly is a great zoo! When we lived in Omaha we always purchased summer passes. As for Ms. Eide, I hope she doesn’t procreate. Gene pool is far too shallow.
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Kari – It’s a shame because she’s cute. She just has the intellect of bread mold.
Metoo – And filled with bleach. Sadly, she would have only learned a lesson if she lost her hand.
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Every generation says the next generation is full of idiots screwing everything up and every generation has been wrong about that up until now.
My greatest fear is that we will be the first generation to be right.
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Loki – Many, not all, millennials I know are completely self-absorbed dolts detached from reality. They are the result of the “Everybody gets a trophy mentality.”
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Can’t cure stupid–wonder what this bint is like when she’s sober?
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Doc – Probably the kind of girl who likes her hand slammed in the door when making love.
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Not surprising. I’ve been mistaken for a three legged tiger before, so…
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Proof – My eyes! The goggles do nothing!
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This. This is what happens when you let your kids grow up watching Disney movies and fail to teach them we are not the top of the food chain.
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Mushdogs – She won’t be feeling the love, or anything else for that matter, for a very long time.
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What this the world coming to when you can’t even pet a three legged tiger after hours?
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Kevin – It’s the downfall of America as we know it!
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