A San Diego man claims he was stabbed by a woman with a beard. There is no word whether the woman in question was Michelle Obama.
Police spokesman Robert Heims told Fox 5 San Diego that the 39-year-old victim, whose name has not been released, walked up to a group of people and asked for a cigarette. At that point, Heims said, the woman walked up to the victim and told him to get away from her things. She then stabbed him on the left side of his neck.
The victim was taken to a hospital and treated for non-life-threatening injuries. The suspect fled the scene, and is described as a white woman “with a beard”, weighing approximately 400 pounds and wearing a white T-shirt and jeans.
You know, the beard caught my interest – I can shave her beard while she can shave my back – but the 400 pounds sealed the deal. I am hereby volunteering to bail this woman out, on the condition she will make sweet, sweaty love to me in between quarterly-hour feedings.
*Hat Tip to TXNick, who ruined my appetite with this woman’s visual.
Now here is something to be feared.
A 400 pound woman with a beard.
With a knife she slashed,
A man next to her trash,
All in all, that’s just too weird!
LikeLiked by 1 person
TXNick – Yeah, you better comment after sending me this messed up story!
LikeLike
If San Diego PD cannot find a 400 pound bearded woman, they may need to change the logo on their cars to something other than America’s Finest. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ingineer – I’m no detective, but I would start with the carnies.
LikeLike
How fast can a 400 pound woman move? Anyone with left over Christmas candy can catch her.
LikeLike
I’ve seen this sideshow before… There was also the dog faced dog, the visible woman, worlds tallest dwarf, and the hornless unicorn…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Cathy – Or at least lure her into the police station with the promise of pizza and brownies.
Sully – And the virgin Kardashian.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Where’s Crocodile Dundee when you need him?
LikeLiked by 3 people
MelP – Classic!
LikeLike
Hard to take that article seriously when they say she “ran off”. At 400 pounds….how on earth could she do anything but waddle off. And I use the term “she” loosely.
LikeLike
Metoo – Maybe she had the runs, and the article misinterpreted the phrase?
LikeLiked by 1 person
+1 CATHYPOP
LikeLike