Drive Angry

A Florida woman was arrested this weekend after trying to force her car through a funeral procession, most likely to disrobe outside a Waffle House.

A car has crashed into the middle of a funeral procession for a victim of the Orlando massacre, putting two cops in hospital.

The funeral motorcade for Jean Carlos Mendez Perez was traveling from a church to a grave site in Kissimmee, south of Orlando, when an impatient female motorist tried to bypass the procession around 11.30am.

A female driver? Color me surprised.

Two Osceola County deputies – who were on motorcycles to protect the procession – were rushed to the hospital after the crash. One is in a serious but stable condition and the other is stable.

I can already see the conversation at the Osceola County Sheriff’s Medical Dispensary:

“Hey bud, how were you injured in the line of duty?”
“I was shot three times responding to a robbery. You?”
“Um… some stupid bint drove through a funeral procession and knocked me off my bike.”

This is why I told my coworkers I was stabbed in the stomach while stopping a kidnapping, instead of telling them about the twisted intestines.

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