A Tennessee woman filed a police report against a Japanese steakhouse after she was “assaulted” by what I can only describe as a mildly vulgar water pistol.
Isabelle Lassiter said she and her family were dining at the Wasabi Japanese Steakhouse in Murfreesboro on Monday when a chef produced a plastic doll resembling a little boy and pulled down its pants. A thin stream of water spurted from a hole located in the doll’s genital area and hit Lassiter in the face, she said.
Was the water yellow? Did the water taste salty? If not, then your police report will be filed in the
shredder “Ongoing” file.
Restaurant manager Johnny Huang said the doll is a common part of the show patrons get at dinner. Chefs use it to control flames on the hibachi, he said.
Wait, please tell me the manager’s last name is pronounced “Wang.” That would be high-larious!
Lassiter’s husband, James, called the spraying “a sexual-style assault on my wife.”
I remember the time in grade school when I shot the cute girl with a water pistol. We all thought it was hilarious. But it turns out we were wrong: I was sexually harassing the woman. Lesson learned.