Day work started Saturday, and is the case with most weekends, we were excruciatingly busy. Sure, we had the mundane, everyday jobs – robberies, stolen guns, etc. – but a retail theft came in which made us all giggle.
A man allegedly walked into the Acme supermarket and was seen placing items into his backpack. The guy strolled past the registers and out the door, where he was stopped by store security. Police were called and after speaking to the witnesses, the shoplifter was arrested. In their report, the officers listed the items taken:
“Multiple bottles of baby formula… and two boxes of condoms.”
Hey brah, isn’t that closing the stable door after the horse has bolted?