Wined, Sealed, Delivered

firebox-wine-condomSpeaking of Weiners, a new wine accessory has hit the market, and its aim is to assure your bottle of white remains fresh. Meet the wine condom.

The most recent incarnation of the love-glove is the “wine condom”. This may conjure up images of full-bodied reds with notes of vanilla, but wine condoms in fact have nothing to do with contraception.

The wine condom acts as a stopper. Much like a regular condom, it can be rolled down to, ahem, prevent leakages. The shrink-to-fit technology of the condom creates a water-tight seal on any bottle, preventing your favorite plonk from spilling out or turning.

With a 99.9 per cent success rate, wine condoms are even more effective than actual condoms, which prevent pregnancy 98 per cent of the time.

Once you and your partner finish the bottle, it may be a good idea to transfer the wine condom to your, um, carafe. You know, just in case drunk sex is celebrated in your home.

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