The Wind Cries Hairy

eloisa-gonzalez-revealing-dressMeet Eloisa Gonzalez.

Eloisa is a Canarian television info-babe who has been a New Year’s Eve staple forever. This year, Eloisa made more than a few balls drop at midnight.

Tenerife-born Eloisa Gonzalez has been tasked with leading the countdown to January 1 on Canarian television for nearly a decade. But the regional state TV channel’s decision to transmit live on the windy island of La Gomera turned this weekend’s show into the most memorable.

Her high cut dress gave the impression she wasn’t wearing underwear.

The 35-year-old, who began her TV career as a reporter covering the famous Canary Islands carnivals, said despite the apparent evidence to the contrary: ‘I wasn’t aware of what had happened at the time and I didn’t even notice the cold.

No, but every other male viewer noticed. How come the United States had to watch a doped-up Mariah Carey, and the Canary islands were blessed with seeing mile-long legs? It just isn’t fair.

Dear Verizon, could you please add Canarian television to my subscription service, please?

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