On The Wings Of Love

james-van-der-beek-cryingHave you recently been dumped by your significant other? Are you an angry, sarcastic loner who cannot maintain an adult relationship? If the answer to these questions is yes, does Hooters have a deal for you!

Yes, to celebrate Valentine’s Day, the world-famous “breastaurant” is giving scorned lovers the chance to destroy photos of their exes in return for a plate of wings. Buy 10 boneless wings, trash your ex, get 10 more boneless wings. Ain’t love grand?

In the event that you don’t want to go to Hooters and ogle waitresses alongside middle-school baseball teams, you can do the shredding online. After that, you can print a coupon, order the wings to go, and return to your loveless home to eat them alone. On Valentine’s Day.

This is a pretty good idea, but it would be exponentially better Hooters would let you literally shred your ex… in an industrial wood chipper.

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