Embracing The Senior Slide

hee-haw-jackassA Florida woman is suing a local Mexican restaurant after climbing on a donkey statue, sliding off, and fracturing her vertebrae.

Kimberly Bonn is seeking damages in excess of $15,000 related to an Aug. 31, 2015, incident at El Jalisco in Tallahassee.

Fifteen thousand dollars? How about we give her two bits, a back massage, and a swift kick in the ass?

The lawsuit, filed Feb. 3 in Leon County, claims that Bonn was climbing on the life-sized donkey statue to have her picture taken, which the restaurant “permitted and encouraged,” when she slipped off the back, fell on the floor and suffered “significant injuries, including a fractured spine.”

Did someone tinker with the English language while I was sleeping, because where I come from, “permitted and encouraged” is a far cry from “forced at gunpoint.”

According to the lawsuit, El Jalisco was negligent in creating the hazard without adequate safety features, determining whether the statue was slippery or failing to warn Bonn about the dangers involved in climbing on the statue.

Why the f**k would a grown-ass adult need to be warned about the dangers of climbing a tall donkey statue? This broad made a conscious decision – most likely helped by alcohol – to straddle the donkey, and she fell on her ass. As far as I’m concerned she is not owed one shiny nickel.

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5 thoughts on “Embracing The Senior Slide

  1. How old was this dimwit? It would seem that mentally she is around 10-12 years old. That stunt she pulled is something kids would do. I agree, not one red cent is owed her.

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