Florida Criminal Is Down In The Dumps

Meet Demetrius Vidale.

Demetrius, through no fault of his own, was involved in a shootout with a Broward County Sheriff’s deputy Monday. The incident occurred just as Demetrius was turning his life around. Officers served a search warrant at his residence, and Demetrius dumped all over it.

Demetrius Vidale, 24, faces five charges including attempted first-degree murder, attempted murder of a law enforcement officer with a deadly weapon, armed robbery, driving with a suspended license and obstructing a police officer serving a search warrant. Deputies received a search warrant to match Vidale’s DNA to the crime scene, and he was detained after a deputy found him driving in Fort Lauderdale Tuesday.

Vidale was given a copy of a judge’s search warrant, which he put on a chair and then defecated on.

“[Vidale] refused to comply by not allowing his photographs to be taken or provide his DNA and master prints. Vidale stated that the judge had no jurisdiction over him,” the report reads.

Hey Einstein, by shitting all over the search warrant, you just gave the investigators your DNA. There is good news, however; you’ll be settled in the MENSA block at FCI Tallahassee.

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