Norwegian Wood

The Scandinavian country of Norway was named the “Happiest Country on Earth” this year, and if this survey is accurate, I think we found the reason why.

Sex toy company Lelo has conducted a global survey to find out which country has the most orgasms and where they’re most intense. Coming in first is Norway, with 35 percent of respondents claiming to orgasm every day.

Coming in first?” I see what you did there!

That’s more than three times more than Brits, with only 11 percent claiming to climax so regularly. That might not seem so impressive, but it actually beats the average global rate of climax which is two to three times per week.

There is no relation between the amount of noise someone makes and the intensity of the climax, but in case you were wondering Brazilians are the loudest. A whopping 65 percent claim to be noisy when they’re getting off, compared to second place Norway with 39.9 percent.

Brazilians are not only loud, but they scream in Portuguese. Plus, they’re usually waxed, which is hot.

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8 thoughts on “Norwegian Wood

  1. I recently received my results from Ancestry DNA and much to my surprise I am 17% Scandinavian. On the other hand (hehe) I’m over 50% UK. Add in being over 60 and it reminds me of a similar survey I heard of.

    A lecturer was speaking on sexual frequency and and asked his audience how many of them had sex at least one time a day. A few hands went up. He asked, “how many of you have sex at least one time per week?” Most of the audience raised their hand. A few more hands went up when he asked how many had sex only once or twice a month. Finally he asked if there was anyone in the crowd who only had sex once a year. Way in the back was an old man enthusiastically waving his hand in the air. “Sir,” the lecturer said, “I understand that you are saying that you have sex once a year, but I have to ask why you’re so excited.”

    The old man replied, “Because tonight’s the night!”

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Do you suppose the Scandanavians take into account all the Islamic rapists when they come up with their statistics?

    Like

  3. Once a day……I should be so lucky! Of course, that would probably require a major investment in batteries. Perhaps time to purchase stock in Duracell.

    Liked by 1 person

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