Never Bring A Wife To A Gunfight

Meet Susan Kettell, of Sandwich, Massachusetts.

Susan is a rational, centered woman who spends her time enjoying the finer things in life; anger, alcohol, knives, and free-flowing boobies.

Susan Kettell, 39, of Sandwich, was driving a blue Ford Explorer on Saturday when police received a call from another driver who claimed the woman tried to crash into the victim’s car. Kettell then pulled behind the victim’s vehicle at a red light and began waving a double-edged dagger.

Kettell then allegedly got out of the Explorer and ripped off her shirt before running bare-chested toward the victim’s car while flailing the knife. The caller who contacted police, meanwhile, drove off.

Police stated it was unclear if the caller sped away because he was afraid of the knife, or afraid of the saggy titties.

Kettell, who police say was intoxicated at the time, was later found and placed under arrest.

The first sign of intoxication was most likely Kettell’s mug shot, above. Yes, that is her actual mug shot, and no, she does not look batshit insane at all.


7 thoughts on “Never Bring A Wife To A Gunfight

  1. Nope! She is not bat-shit crazy. The little lady is picturing herself cutting the photographers head off while nekid. Pity this woman’s children.


  2. For alcohol being a depressant, it certainly fires a lot of people up! That chick coming at me bare chested with a knife would make me hit the gas and run the red light. I’m pretty sure the officer wouldn’t give me a ticket once he saw her.


  3. Proof – Considering hot crazy insane most women are, alcohol may or may not have been a factor. Wait, did I type that or just think it?

    Cathy – Someone send word to her; she must be my bride!

    Metoo – No, probably not. That’s the problem with my profession. Every “naked woman” call involves the last woman you’d ever want to see naked.


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