Security Guard Is Caught Short

A gaggle of thugs committed a home invasion inside a Los Angeles mansion this week, after the security guard was distracted by an accomplice with a great ass.

A security guard distracted by a woman in short shorts was overpowered at gunpoint today by four males who then zip-tied him, took his weapons and burglarized a multi-million dollar home in the Beverly Crest area of West Los Angeles.

“A female black wearing short shorts and a furry jacket distracted the guard,” Eisenman said. That enabled four males to overpower the guard, zip-tie him, take his guns and burglarize the house.

I’m truly amazed this plan hasn’t been implemented by criminals across the country. Most security guards are male, and males are easily distracted by hot women; especially those wearing short shorts.

7 thoughts on “Security Guard Is Caught Short

  1. Nothing like getting back to basics. What would be the best distraction for a male? A scantily clad female, of course. Brilliant plan!


  2. #MeToo, I like short shorts. Bikinis, lingerie, boobies, buns, legs, the whole thing. It’s those “Nasty Women” (especially the ones in the pink hats) that don’t like any of that stuff.


  3. Like you Wyatt, I’m really surprised someone has pulled this scam before. But then again, as I’m sure you are aware, your average criminal IS NOT a rocket surgeon! : )


  4. The home owners should have hired a company that only hires eunuchs. Maybe the criminals would have found the break-in “harder.”


  5. Ronni – I’m sorry, I was gawking at the photo of Allison Stokke.

    RG – Like Hillary and Huma.

    William – Or a brain scientist. The bright side? Job security.

    TXNick – Or at least some gay guys.


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