Frilly Shoumaker

Meet Jason Shoumaker of Texas. While that is indeed Jason’s mugshot above, Jason is no criminal. In fact, he may be the greatest hero in American history.

University of Texas Law’s former facilities director, Jason Shoumaker, was arrested on six charges of tampering with government records. Specifically, Shoumaker is accused of tampering with his time sheets to log full 8-hour days at work while he was, apparently, regularly galavanting around Vegas and Cozumel.

As fireable offenses go, the most impressive is always the full Cooper Harris — don’t go to work, continue answering messages as though you are, and see how long you can drag it out. Shoumaker managed to pull it off for over a year.

“Everything ok?” the colleague wrote to Shoumaker on April 3, 2017.

“Yes, on my way to work,” Shoumaker texted in response. In fact, Shoumaker was likely in Las Vegas that day – citing a flurry of charges to his card that included $44.20 at a Hooters Restaurant and $81.00 for a professional massage.

Ladies and gentlemen, I beseech you to see this for the work of genius it is. Shoumaker worked the system better than ever the most corrupt politician, and for this we want to jail him? I vote nay!

The obligatory movie reference is below the fold…

4 thoughts on “Frilly Shoumaker

  1. What really tickles my funnybone about that clip is watching Gutterson, the stone cold sniper from Justified, play a slacker lawyer.

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  2. Having worked in HR, I can’t believe this guy pulled this off for over a year. Quite the organization he worked for…..must have been the federal government.

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  3. Loki – Yeah, I knew he looked familiar the first season, and when I saw Eurotrip for the 100th time, I put two and two together.

    Ronni – I believe it’s the University of Texas, which you would think would be on the ball.

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    1. I did see it said U of Texas I just figured they had to be hooked up with the feds for the guy to get away with this for that long.

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