Cable Guy!

Meet Mildred Newsome.

Mildred enjoys the finer things in life; warm, sunny days, cable television, oral sex

A North Carolina woman is facing charges after she forced a cable repairman to let her perform a sex act on him, police said.

Mildred Newsome, 47, of Fayetteville, was arrested Saturday after an investigation into the man’s accusations following an April 20 repair call at her apartment, Fayetteville police Sgt. Shawn Strepay told The Post.

“The cable guy was there to work on her on box…”

Bawahahahahahahahahahaha, I’m dying! The woman didn’t want her cable fixed; she wanted his cable.

“…and while waiting for it to reset as he was sitting on a couch, she came over, grabbed his hand and forcefully placed his hand on her own breast,” Strepay said. The unidentified technician, in his 30s, tried to resist Newsome’s “unwanted sexual advance,” but she persisted and performed oral sex on him.

Normally I would snark, “Yeah, I’m sure he hated every minute of it,” but since you could put Mildred’s face in some dough and make gorilla cookies, I’m guessing the sex was truly unwanted.

12 thoughts on “Cable Guy!

    1. I’ve been accused of being willing to poke my manhood under a rock, thinking there may be a snake under it. But THAT???? No way.


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