She’s Giving Me Good Vibrations

When initiating a career in burglary and/or theft, it is always a good idea to prioritize your targets. For instance, it’s better to search for jewelry instead of clothing. It’s also better to look for electronics than, say, sex toys.

A burglar broke into a North Carolina residence last week and stole a 12-inch sex toy.

Brunswick County Sheriff’s Office deputies responded Wednesday evening to a reported break-in at a residence in Leland, a town 10 miles from Wilmington.

The burglary suspect, who remains at large, entered the Buckwood Court home and departed with the “12” electric vibrator wand,” two pieces of jewelry, coins, and several other items worth a combined $450.

The beauty of this theft is the thief can place the rings on the toy, so it’s less to carry.

The stolen sex toy is valued at $30, according to the report, which does not reveal whether the item was new or used. Or if it came with batteries.

Maybe it was one of those hybrids you can plug into a socket at a gas station?

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