Since I don’t work for a real police department, I don’t get to utilize real office equipment. Foe example, the computer at my desk caught a nasty virus – it was on my day off, so no, I was not looking for Milana Vayntrub photos. The IT Department demanded the tower be brought downtown so the people who couldn’t be hired by Apple or Google could tinker with it.
That was in early January.
The “fixed” tower returned last week, and an hour after it was dropped off, we were told it needed to be brought back to IT. Why? Because while IT cleaned the virus, they never reprogrammed the computer, nor did they add the pertinent police programs…
For the record, my department is still using Windows 7.
Now the front desk has been empty for a month now. No one sits there because there is no computer. But, like clockwork, a clueless officer does what this chick did on Monday. She entered the room, looked at the empty desk, then at me, and placed her paperwork on the empty desk. Stunned, I said, “You know that desk is empty, right?” She responded, “Well, where should I put it?”
How about on the desk where I am sitting, you stupid bint?
* * * * *
In the first hour of Monday’s tour, we were subjected to two shootings and a homicide. Just another day at the office. An officer, who’s usually very on the ball, brought up two witnesses to the first shooting. He escorted them into the hallway so they could wait to be interviewed.
I was not at my desk, but I heard someone yell, “YO!” I walked to the window, and there the officer was, head in the window, asking, “What’s the code for the door?”
I told him, and when he came into the room I said, “Dude, you’ve been here for two decades. How do you forget the code?”
The officer smiled and said, “I have no idea.” Eh, we all have our off days.