True Detective Stories

For the past ten months, the city’s police stations have been effectively closed to walk-in traffic. Yes, you can still make a report at the police station, but you’re separated by Plexiglas and must wear a mask. The same holds true for victims and/or witnesses of crimes. Every police officer knows this policy, because it has been the rule since the Chinese Wuhan Virus came to our shores.

So imagine my surprise when an officer brought an assault victim to the district Tuesday afternoon.

This dimwit didn’t even transport the victim to the division. Instead, he had the victim follow him to the division, so the cop could simply drop him off and flee the scene. Of course, the fact this dimwit stopped by my desk made it easier for me to dispense my snarky sarcasm – or Snarkasm™ – to him personally.

So dicknuts approached my desk, dropped a pile of paperwork on top and said, “The complainant is downstairs.” Naturally, I replied with, “What are you talking about? The order is we do not bring complainants to the division. It’s been the policy for almost a year.”

Dicknuts was displeased. “I called up here earlier and they told me to bring the guy to the division! Now you’re telling me he has to go back home?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m telling you. It’s not my order. If you have a problem with it, feel free to speak to the Inspector. he’s actually still in his office, right down the hall.”

Dicknuts chafed at that, turned around and stormed out of the building. The last thing I heard him say was, “This is ridiculous.”

A few points of note. 1. Obviously, a detective was assigned and a phone call was made to the victim. 2. The alleged assault occurred on Sunday, and it took the victim two days to make a report. So obviously time was not a factor here. 3. While the officer acted like he was ready to head home, he actually just started his shift. Dicknuts had eight more hours of work ahead of him, so why would he lose his shit about bringing the paperwork to the division?

My guess is he has anger issues and probably should not be on the job. But I’m not a doctor; I only play one on television.

Oh, not related, but important…

The illegitimate president was wearing an earpiece during the inaugural, and his stooges were feeding him his lines throughout the day. In the second tweet, President Pedo walks toward the Marines, and the stooge working the earpiece tells him, “Salute the Marines.” President Pedo then repeats, “Salute the Marines” as he walks by the Marines without saluting.

When watching the bottom video, turn up the volume.

8 thoughts on “True Detective Stories

  1. Mike47 – That’s how far he’s gone. He cannot even recite a speech without the lines being fed to him. And naturally he didn’t salute the Marines. Trump did, every time.


  2. TX Nick – You’d think after winning all three branches of government, they would be happy, but no, they’re eliminating conservatives from polite society. I don’t think they understand what may happen if they keep pushing.


  3. Ronni – If for nothing else than for her – and not Hillary – to be the first female president. She’ll be a disaster – arguably worse than Biden – but at least she has her faculties.


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