Oklahoma: Trees Are Made Of Wood

Meet Blakelee Sands of Oklahoma City, OK. Blakelee wanted to go out for a night on the town, but unfortunately, she is only 18. Luckily, Blakelee took her trusty fake ID to the bar, with hilarious results.

Investigators say that Blakelee Sands sought admittance Tuesday evening to a bar in Edmond, a city outside Oklahoma City. But she was turned away by a bouncer who confiscated her phony Texas ID, which carried the name “McKamie Queen.”

All of the names in the world and this dolt settles on McKamie Queen? Holy crap, this chick is a dullard.

When her demands for the ID’s return were rejected by bar personnel, Sands (seen at right) made the mistake of dialing police.

Cops responding to the 911 call were met by Sands, who recounted the seizure of her ID and the bar’s refusal to return it. The teenager insisted that the ID was authentic and that she was, in fact, “McKamie Queen.” However, when officers ran a computer check on the license number on the “Queen” ID, it came back to a male Texas motorist.

Unfortunately for “McKamie,” giving a false ID to a police officer is a felony, so she’ll be spending some time in the pokey to think about what she did.

**The obscure title reference can be found here.

8 thoughts on “Oklahoma: Trees Are Made Of Wood

  1. Poetic justice would be for her to get incarcerated until a year after her 21st birthday. Just so she would miss the party.


  2. As an ex-wife of mine wrote, in her parody of “Home on the Range,”

    “Oh, give me a home,
    “Where the pickup trucks roam,
    “And the beer has no alcohol, too.*
    “Where the men all wear boots,
    “Hang out in cut-n-shoots,
    “Pretending they’re drunk on 3.2″**

    “Home, home on the range.
    “Oklahoma is strange.
    “Where seldom is heard,
    “An intelligent word.
    “To live here you must be deranged.”

    * Prior to 198?, Oklahoma beer was limited to 3.2% alcohol content unless bought (warm) in a state owned liquor store.
    ** Any beer sold in a bar, chilled, was 3.2

    Another law passed by the Oklahoma politicians required “any time trains met each other on adjacent tracks, both shall come to an immediate stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has passed.”


  3. My friend always liked how a town near Norman voted for a new police station but voted against funding it, so they didn’t build it.

    At least her name wasn’t Adult McAdultface.

    I’m betting she’s used to guys doing whatever she wants them to do but the bouncer and the cop weren’t impressed.


  4. TX Nick – Never been there, but the tornadoes would be enough for me to drive around that state instead of through it.

    Veeshir – That makes absolutely no sense. I was hoping her ID read “McLovin.”

    Kitty – We’ve had a few of those in my division. Guess he was so high he didn’t realize he was about to be arrested.


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