True Detective Stories

There is an X-Men film called “The Wolverine” which was released in 2013. It was a decent film, but one of the actresses – Rila Fukushima – looked really bizarre. With her bangs, she looked like her head was shaped like an acorn. Ironically, she’s a very pretty woman, but her look in this film was weird. I mention this, because the dumbest female police officer in my department looks exactly like her, so I always refer to her as Acorn Head.

Hilariously, this chick think she’s attractive – because who doesn’t want to sleep with something that just fell out of a tree – and she believes she should get special treatment because she has an IQ of 46.

This bint doesn’t like me – probably because I know how to do the job – which gives me a tremendous amount of joy. When Acorn Head comes to the division, she quickly drops off her paperwork and turns tail. When she brings in a job, which is rare, she says as little as possible…

Yesterday, Acorn Head came to the division with a fraud report. I told her to wait a moment as I checked her barely legible report, to make sure she didn’t frak everything up. naturally, she did.

Acorn Head came in late in the tour, and I wasn’t in the mood for an argument with someone who drools into a Dixie Cup, so I accepted the report. I then took seized the opportunity to give her some advice, which I knew she would simply ignore.

We’ll take this report today, but according to the Directives, the location for every fraud report must be the complainant’s home address.”

Acorn Head stared at me, saying nothing.

“I mean, you know that right?”

Acorn Head sarcastically replied, “Okay,” which perplexed me, since she didn’t really answer my question. She then turned around and walked toward the exit.

Now I’m pissed because she thinks this is a joke. I called after her, “It’s in the Directives. You can look them up. It would take thirty seconds.”

Again, this bitch sarcastically replies, “Okay” and leaves the building.

1,217 days.

7 thoughts on “True Detective Stories

  1. “…she’s a very pretty woman, but her look in this film was weird. ”

    The cheek implants didn’t help.

    And the movie was a bit of a disappointment. Almost as bad as “X-Men: The Last Stand.”


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