Thuggage Versus Luggage

Meet William Hodge of Daytona Beach, Flori-Duh. William is an avid fisherman and really likes the excitement of the hunt. Unless, of course, he catches an alligator; then it’s on like Donkey Kong.

According to police, William Hodge, a 32-year-old fisherman, was arrested early today after officers spotted him trying to fling the purloined alligator atop a building in Daytona Beach Shores.

I’ve mentioned this previously, but it bears repeating. NASCAR’s Daytona International Speedway is an amazing place; the rest of Daytona is mostly white trash.

When Hodge’s attempt to launch the alligator failed, Hodge slammed the reptile to the ground and stomped on it, according to a charging affidavit.

When cops approached Hodge, seen at right, he “raised his hands up as if he were giving up and was taken into custody.” Asked what he was doing when throwing the alligator in the air, Hodge reportedly replied that he was “teaching it a lesson.”

The lesson the gator learned is to immediately eat white trash fisherman when you get the chance.

4 thoughts on “Thuggage Versus Luggage

  1. I’d think it’s safe to say that when someone is trying to teach an alligator a lesson, meth’s involved.
    If it were LSD, he’d just have yelled at it and then run away when it started yelling back.

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  2. When I was a rookie, a guy on LSD tried to take my partner’s gun. I hit him in the chest with my baton and he started laughing. Moments later, we were calling for an assist.

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  3. What kind of idiot steals an alligator to teach it a lesson? I agree that the guy had to be higher than a kite.

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