Bring Out The Gimps

A group of gimps showed up at a Fort Lauderdale, Florida city commission to plead for a tax-payer funded sex dungeon. They were serious.

City commission meetings can often be a bland affair to all but the most dedicated, civically-minded citizens, but a trio of women briefly spiced up a discussion about yard waste at a meeting in Fort Lauderdale Tuesday night.

The group of citizens, who waltzed over to the lectern, wore skin-tight costumes. One of the women, introduced by Mayor Dean Trantalis as “Ms. Krave,” made an unusual request.

I mean, go with the skin-tight suit… in Florida. where it’s still really hot. Dumbass.

“Good evening council peoples, you may call me ‘Mistress,’” the woman begins. “I am here standing neutral to the motion approving an agreement for the proprietary purchase of yard waste processing and disposal.”

But the woman, in apparent fetish gear, quickly pivots from leaves and grass clippings to an unusual citizen proposal for a different way to spend a portion of the nearly $1 million proposed in the agreement with Waste Management.

I’m not exactly sure why so many Floridians are mentally deranged, but I’m glad they’re there, because the posts simply write themselves.