Feel-Good Friday

A 4,000-year old Bronze Age coffin was found in the pond of a British golf course, which contained the decedent inside. It’s an amazing archeological find which is being processed by the University of Sheffield’s Archeology Department.

An early Bronze Age log coffin containing the remains of a man buried with an axe thought to date from 4,000 years ago has been discovered accidentally on a golf course.

The discovery of the coffin and its contents sparked a rescue mission funded by a £70,000 ($97,000) grant from Historic England and supported by a team of staff and students from the University of Sheffield’s Department of Archaeology working nearby who offered their assistance.

The coffin, which is three meters long and one meter wide, was specially protected to ensure the delicate structure did not crumble after it was exposed to the sun and air. It was made from hollowing out a tree trunk, and plants were used to cushion the body, then a gravel mound was raised over the grave; practices that were only afforded to people with a high status within Bronze Age society.

According to the archaeologists, the axe seems more a symbol of authority than a practical tool, while the coffin gives an insight into how social hierarchy was marked out in the early Bronze Age.

I’ve played golf for years, and the best thing I ever found on a course was the occasional ball and some spare change.

Loch Ness Monster Sighted… In China?

Well, I was searching for a story to kick off the weekend, and the best I could come up with was an alleged Loch Ness Monster sighting… in a lake…. in Jiaozhou City, China.

Seems totally believable to me.

The first-ever long-distance Loch Ness Monster sighting has been reported from China. Weiming Jiang spotted Nessie from 5,300 miles away in Jiaozhou City after he spotted the beast via a webcam.

Recorder of the Official Loch Ness Monster Sightings Register, Gary Campbell said: “She saw a black dot, then two, very close to the shore.

“They moved on the water for six minutes. It is the first accepted sighting we have had from China but just shows you can see Nessie from anywhere in the world.”

Settle down, Gary. If you watch the video at the link, it certainly seems like something is moving across the lake. That said, it could be anything; a shark, a large fish, or just Diego going for a leisurely swim.

Actually, that last guess is inaccurate. Diego doesn’t swim… he floats.

Red Light At Night

Supplied/Ethan Haze Photography

An Australian photographer was able to capture “red sprites” high above a storm in Australia.

Ethan Takerei thought he would have to travel to the United States to capture red sprites.

The 28-year-old Christchurch man, who runs Ethan Haze Photography, jumped out of bed on Sunday night as he heard wild weather overhead, packed up all his photography gear and raced to a Halswell Quarry vantage point.

The result? He may have become just the third New Zealander to capture red sprites – a unique weather event that creates red lightning bolts 50 kilometres above a storm, the same height as more than 13 Aoraki/Mt Cooks stacked up on one another.

Sadly, no other Aussies were able to see them because the government has locked them in their homes.

The weather event is rarely seen from the ground due to its high altitude.

I stopped being a lightning fan in high school, while walking home from work and having one strike less than a half mile away. Now you tell me there is red lightning? Nope, nope, and more nope.

Unvetted Afghan “Refugees” Settling In U.S.

The Biden administration is gleefully accepting nearly 100,000 unvetted Afghan “refugees” into the country between now and 2022. Many of these people are not vaccinated for even the most basic diseases – Virginia has a few who have spread measles – and no one knows who is an actual refugee and who is a terrorist.

The Biden administration began notifying governors about how many Afghan refugees would be resettled within their states from the first batch of 37,000 evacuees.

The administration plans to resettle 65,000 Afghans by the end of September, and 30,000 more by September 2022.

California and Texas will receive the most, while Hawaii, South Dakota, West Virginia, Wyoming, and the District of Columbia will not receive anyone from the first group.

Policies like these will be the final nail in America’s coffin. If you click the graphic above, you’ll see how many of these Afghans will be settling in each state. Also note, there are a multitude of red states – Texas, Pennsylvania, Arizona, Georgia, North Carolina – who will be forced to take in over 1,000 Afghans.

This has nothing to do with humanitarian aid. It has everything to do with insuring there will never be another Republican president.

The Shite Has Hit The Fan Freezer

The Moore Police Department (OK) is investigating an incident where a man defecated into a grocery store’s freezer. Sorry ma’am, that’s not a Klondike bar.

A man allegedly defecated in a grocery store freezer Sunday night, and a woman who was shopping accidentally put her hand in it while reaching for groceries that were covering it.

“I pick up a bag of pizza rolls and there’s literally s–t,” Shirley Wright-Johnson said in a video of the incident. “Human s–t. Excuse my language.”

A Sunday trip to the store for she and her kids turned out to be more than what the Moore mom bargained for. “I was upset, I was disgusted, I feel like I was violated,” she said in an interview with KFOR.

The scumbag who allegedly did this is pictured above; not that you would be able to identify him – or his ass – by scouring that grainy, black and white photo. Good grief, Oklahoma, the Dust Bowl was nearly one hundred years ago. Update your apparatus!

Five Guys Is Down To Three Now

Meet Anthony Towles of Tyrone, PA.

Anthony was working at a Five Guys restaurant when a coworker claimed Anthony wasn’t working hard enough. Anthony did not appreciate this constructive criticism, and decided to do something about it.

Anthony Towles, 51, of Tyrone, is facing felony charges after police were called to Five Guys in Altoona and found the victim with a stab wound to their neck, mere inches from a carotid artery.

It’s literally a miracle no one has done this to Diego.

Police report that both the victim and Towles stated that they got into an argument over the victim telling him he wasn’t working hard enough. The two employees then made their way into the back parking lot behind the shopping center. The victim told police that at this point, Towles said “I’m going to kill you.”

Towles then related that he took a pen from his sock and swung it at the victim. Police noted that the victim had an inch long, rather deep cut to the left side of his head behind his ear, mere inches from a major artery.

See, I don’t get this. You’re in a restaurant with knives, a scalding hot stove, and enough cholesterol to kill ten men, but you attack the guy with a sock pen? Come on, Anthony, be better.

Conservatives Need To Flee California

Fascist, corrupt California governor Gavin Newsom survived his recall defeat, and beat challenger Larry Elder by receiving more votes and voter fraud.

California Gov. Gavin Newsom has defeated a recall bid seeking to oust him from office, with his chief rival, GOP candidate Larry Elder, conceding defeat.

Elder told a crowd of supporters on Sept. 14 that “we may have lost the battle, but we are going to win the war,” suggesting his first campaign may not be his last.

Unofficial results of the 2021 gubernatorial recall election as of 2:55 am on Sept. 15 showed Newsom was likely to remain governor of California. Around 63.9 percent of people were counted as voting “no” in the election, according to the California Secretary of State’s Office, while 36.1 percent voted “yes,” with all precincts partially reporting.

I am also hearing GOP turnout was very low, which doesn’t surprise me. The state had a chance to get a governor who would turn California around, but like most solid blue states, the residents would prefer fiefdom. John Cardillo said this today, and it bears repeating:

“Conservatives and every other freedom loving American need to leave California. Let those who did whatever they did to keep him get what they deserve.”

I’m Wyatt Earp and I support this message.

Cystem Of A Down

Normally I would be at work by now, entering jobs and yelling at Diego. Instead, I took the day off because I have yet another medical procedure. This time, my dermatologist needs to remove a cyst in the back of my head.

And yes, the cyst is likely larger than my brain.

This may be the fifth or sixth cyst I have had removed, all from the head. Apparently Mrs. Earp hits me with a hammer once every few years.

The procedure won’t take long, but I’m a big bleeder with things like this, and I’ll get stitched up afterward. The doc will send the cyst to the lab to see if its cancerous, and I should be back in work tomorrow.

While I’m at it, the Mohs surgery for my skin cancer is two weeks from today. I may be out longer for that, because the previous Mohs surgery cost me twelve stitches in my forehead. It’s not like I’m a handsome man, so bring on the stitches. I just hope they get all the cancer out.

The Flying Nun

The odd site of a nun and a skeleton which confronted drivers on Spring Bank West outside the old Hull General Cemetery (Image: Hull Live)

So here’s something you don’t see every day. A woman dressed as a nun was dancing with a skeleton outside the UK’s Hull General Cemetery.

A woman dressed as a nun was seen cavorting with a skeleton beside a Hull graveyard. The jaw-dropping site was captured on camera by a passing car passenger on Spring Bank West outside the old Hull General Cemetery.

The woman was wearing a cream nun’s habit and coif headpiece. She was seen appearing to dance with one model human skeleton and playing with another of what looked like a dog.

A startled witness said: “Literally, she was stood at the cemetery on Spring Bank West opposite the turn off for Hymers school. She was dancing with a skeleton.”

I’ll bet a few of the locals have a bone to pick with her.

It looks like the nun’s dancing takes a lot of skull.

Hull police probably believe this is a grave offense.

Femur? I hardly know her!