The Best Fans In The Country

Philadelphia fans always describe themselves at the “best fans in the country.” That may be accurate if Philadelphia was a country. Everyone else in America, and the world, know Philly fans – especially Eagles fans – are mostly drunken, white trash thugs.

Don’t believe me? Read on

Sixers forward Mike Scott may be loved by Philadelphians, but he is a Washington Redskins fan and found out on Sunday that supporting his favorite NFL team is not that easy to do in Philly.

Scott organized a tailgate to hang out with some Eagles fans at the team’s home opener and he wore a Redskins jersey. At the tailgate, an alleged fight broke out between Scott and some Eagles fans at Lincoln Financial Field. It was all apparently caught on video (which includes NSFW language and graphic content).

The Philadelphia 76ers have released a statement regarding the altercation: “We are aware of the situation and are in the process of gathering more information. We will have no further comment at this time.”

So Scott, a member of the Philadelphia 76ers, hung out with Eagles fans for some reason, and they decided to fight him because he was wearing the “wrong” jersey. Yep, best fans in the world.

I swear to Vishnu, I am out of this city and out of this state the moment I retire.

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DA Holds Presser On Philly Shooting

Larry Krasner, the Soros-appointed Philadelphia District attorney, held a press conference yesterday regarding the six police officers shot and the felonious thug who shot them. During the post, I’ll use my News Translator to sift through all the b.s. you’re about to read.

Philadelphia District Attorney Larry Krasner held a news conference Monday morning to discuss charges against the man accused of shooting six Philadelphia police officers as well as four additional people in relation to the incident.

Translation: Krasner is open about his disdain for police, but the mayor forced him into the press conference. The mayor despises the police as well, but Jim Kenney would like to be reelected.

Krasner began his address by saying he would be offering limited information, “much more limited than we had hoped to present today.”

Translation: Krasner would rather not let the police department enjoy some rare good press, so the defendant’s really dirty details will be omitted.

He said the investigation was so enormous and still ongoing, that he could not risk stepping on the activity of the Philadelphia Police Department in this case.

Translation: This is a lie, since Krasner and his assistant district attorneys step on our investigations on a daily basis. For example prosecution was declined on my supermarket robbery, which had an arrest and very clear video of the incident. Squashed.

“This will take time,” said Krasner. “It could take months to complete the investigation, but it will be done correctly.”

Translation: By the time the investigation is concluded, everyone would have forgotten about it, and we can pretend it never happened.

Maurice Hill, 36 faces the following charges:

Multiple counts of Murder-Attempt to Commit, multiple counts of Aggravated of Assault, multiple counts of Assault of Law Enforcement Officer, multiple counts of Simple Assault, multiple counts of Recklessly Endangering Another Person, multiple counts of Unlawful Restraint, Criminal Conspiracy, Possessing Instruments of Crime, Possession of Firearm with Altered Manufacture’s Number, Violation of Uniform Firearms Act-Former Convict, Causing-Risking a Catastrophe, Control Substance Act-Manufacture/Delivery/Possession with Intent to Deliver, and Control Substance Act- Knowingly/Intentionally Possession of Control Substance.

Translation: This looks good, but Krasner will have at least half these charges dropped before they get out of the preliminary court appearance.

Nothing will change in the District Attorney’s Office. Sadly, incidents like this one will become more frequent, because when the politicians tell people they don’t have to obey the law, people listen.

So, This Is Happening

The citizens of Philadelphia have decided they will organize a “Free Maurice Hill” march tomorrow evening. For those of you who are unaware, Maurice Hill is the “man” who fired at countless Philadelphia police officers Wednesday evening, and shot six. Hill has a lengthy criminal record, but the people of Philadelphia will be spending their Friday evening calling for his outright release.

I hate this town. I hate its people.

Fightadelphia

Innocent passersby were welcomed to random beat downs by Philadelphia’s most despicable citizens recently. The victims were simply walking down the street, then attacked by a gaggle of human detritus.

A gang of teenage girls filmed themselves targeting female strangers in random attacks on the streets of Philadelphia.

The disturbing video shows the girls approaching their unsuspecting victims on the street before proceeding to slap them and wrestle them to the ground.

You won’t see this on any of the news reports, but both the attackers and victims each had something in common. The attackers were all black females, and the victims were either white or Asian. Funny how that fact never saw the light of day.

One girl is filmed being approached by the group before being slapped round the face. She attempts to walk away but her path is blocked.

Another woman is shown being punched and shoved around, before passersby intervene to stop the shocking attack.

At least one woman fought back, which is usually the prescription to stopping these thugs.

Shootadelphia

The city of Philadelphia made news this week, and as usual, it did for all the wrong reasons.

Dozens of people from Southwest Philadelphia gathered Sunday night at Finnegan Playground to dance, grill, and eat while celebrating recent graduates from area high schools. But by Monday morning, many of them were together again in a rowhouse near the playground — mourning Isiaka Meite, 24, who was killed during a mass shooting that erupted in the middle of the celebration.

Senseless. I remember growing up we would settle arguments with fistfights, then usually shake hands afterward. Now someone looks at you the wrong way and a gunfight erupts.

The mass shooting — which killed Meite and injured five others, including four teens — put a grim punctuation mark on a bloody Father’s Day weekend in Philadelphia. Police said that on Saturday and Sunday, 28 people were shot — five fatally — in 19 incidents across the city. It was the highest number of shooting victims recorded in a 48-hour stretch in the city since at least the beginning of 2015, police statistics show.

In total, more than 550 people have been shot in Philadelphia this year, according to police statistics — an average of more than three per day.

The truly sad part of all this is the Philadelphia District Attorney’s Office is enabling these slaughters by giving gun criminals a slap on the wrist, and not vigorously prosecuting the most egregious offenders. The city has become the modern-day equivalent of the wild west, and the bodies will continue piling up.

Philly Enjoys A Tall, Cool Glass Of STFU

It has been two years since leftist Philadelphia mayor Jim Kenney forced a “soda tax” on the city’s residents. Thanks to Kenney, a man who knows his way around a beverage, the price of a two-liter bottle of soda is now at least one dollar more, and the average tax is 1.5 cents per ounce.

So, how beneficial has the tax been for the city? Take a wild guess.

When the soda tax was first announced, workers at Pepsi took a hit. “With sales slumping because of the new Philadelphia sweetened beverage tax, Pepsi said Wednesday that it will lay off 80 to 100 workers at three distribution plants that serve the city,” philly.com reported in March of 2017.

I have little sympathy for Pepsi here, because instead of tolerating the layoffs, they should have packed their bags and moved to a more tax-friendly city. Pepsi is still here, gleefully accepting the taxes which are ruining their business. Those layoffs are on you, Pepsi. Own it.

And last month, the local outlet reported that the owner of Acme Markets, who has 16 stores in Philadelphia, had to cut employees’ hours because of the tax: “The beverage tax fell on about 4,000 items. In Acme city stores, soda sales dropped as much as 80 percent. Sales of other items covered by the tax, such as juices, creamers and energy drinks, were down 30 percent, and the number of customers declined by 5 percent. Philly stores cut an average of 150 to 200 employee hours per week, resulting in lighter paychecks for employees.”

I have a little more sympathy for Acme, because they don’t have as many options as Pepsi does. Kenney’s original claim was the soda tax was meant to curb obesity. I could have bought that tripe if he didn’t immediately state diet drinks would be taxed as well. Like most leftists, Kenney lies every time he opens his bloated face hole.

But the hit the employees took did not equate to a win for the “health” of its citizens. As noted by Hotair, Philadelphia residents were traveling outside the city to avoid the tax hike on their drinks.

Well, duh. I know I am surrounded by white trash, thugs, and overall morons, but the people of this city protested with their wallets. The Bensalem Shop Rite, which is outside the city, is a fifteen-minute drive. I gleefully head there once every couple of weeks for beverages. It’s a chance to pass my father-in-law’s cemetery, where I occasionally stop by, and an opportunity to give Kenney and his tax the middle finger.

Welcome To Drugadelphia

Meet Philadelphia Mayor James Kenney. Kenney has the distinction of being the worst mayor in America. A rabid leftist, Kenney is responsible for the highest homicide rate in nearly twenty-five years.

Not content to own a murder rate which rivals that of Chicago, Kenney now wants to open “safe injection sites” for the city’s thousands of heroin addicts. What could possibly go wrong?

The opioid epidemic has ravaged Philadelphia, and many in the city feel that drastic measures are necessary to stem a scourge of overdoses, including a radical plan to provide a safe space where people can use illegal drugs while under supervision.

The Justice Department sued the nonprofit Safehouse in February, arguing that opening the facility in Philadelphia — the first supervised consumption facility in the United States — would violate federal law. Likening the idea to a crack house, federal officials say allowing the use of illicit drugs with impunity enables and exacerbates the intractable opioid problem; the United States attorney for the Eastern District of Pennsylvania argued that opening Safehouse would violate the Controlled Substances Act, which makes it illegal to open or run a place where illegal drugs are knowingly used.

Safehouse and its backers are now arguing in a court filing and in interviews that innovative local action is the only thing that will help solve Philadelphia’s opioid crisis, one of the worst in the country, and that ensuring users don’t fatally overdose is an immediate public need.

Yeah sorry, but my give-a-shit meter is completely empty. These junkies are responsible for robberies, thefts, assaults, and other equally heinous crimes – mostly while high – and we’re supposed to ALLOW them to shoot up on our dime? Yeah, no.

Oh, here’s the best part. The “mayor,” a man who declared Philly a sanctuary city when he was sworn in, is considering ordering the police to ignore the junkies going in and out of the injection sites. So, if said junkie had fifty packets of heroin on him, we won’t be able to arrest him. Worse still, if the same junkie comes out of the site, and say, starts threatening people, “the mayor” doesn’t want him arrested.

The site is slated to be placed in the Kensington section of the city; ground zero for heroin. It’s miles and miles away from Kenney’s home, of course, so he doesn’t case, but there are still some good people in that neighborhood, and now their neighborhood will resemble a scene from The Walking Dead.

I hate this city so much. I despise it. I wish it would burn to the ground.

P.S. – I’m taking Saturday off so I can recover from sleep deprivation. I’ll have a Sunday Services post up.

The Feel Good Story Of The Year

Philadelphia has once again claimed the title of the most corrupt city in the nation yesterday, after union kingpin John “Johnny Doc” Doughtery and City Councilman Bobby Henon – guess the partywere indicted on 116 federal corruption charges.

Labor leader and political kingmaker John J. Dougherty and Philadelphia City Councilman Bobby Henon were charged Wednesday with embezzlement, bribery, and theft, along with six other people affiliated with Local 98 of the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers.

The feds have been looking at Dougherty for well over a decade, and to be honest, I’m surprised it took that long. Everyone knew Dougherty was dirty, but no one had the stones to do anything about it.

The sprawling 116-count federal indictment alleges that Dougherty, 58, and his associates stole more than $600,000 in union funds and spent it wildly on no-show jobs; expensive meals at restaurants including the Palm Philadelphia; an array of construction projects; and purchases that included big-screen TVs, dog food, and baby supplies.

Well, for most bosses, that is the union way.

“Henon abdicated his duty to provide honest services to the city of Philadelphia because he made decisions on behalf of John Dougherty, rather than the people that elected him to City Council,” First Assistant U.S. Attorney Jennifer Arbittier Williams said during a morning news conference at the U.S. Attorney’s Chestnut Street office.

The only downside to this indictment is our uber-corrupt mayor Jim Kenney was not picked up in the sweep. Of course, his indictment is always one bribe away.

Amber Waves Of Crack

An Instagram “celebrity” claims she came up on the “mean streets” of Philadelphia, and had to do some pretty horrible things to stay afloat. I’m guessing this haircut is the most egregious.

Instagram model and pop culture sensation Amber Rose tried to be a drug dealer when she was younger, but to no avail.

“I usually don’t tell people this but I tried selling crack in my neighborhood,” the model said. “They said I was gonna get robbed, I was a girl and I was too pretty, and it wasn’t going to happen.”

She was “too pretty” to sell crack, everyone. That’s totes believable.

Amber added that she stayed involving with drug dealers, but she did it in the back office weighing substances and bagging them so she wouldn’t be as vulnerable.

Amber Rose, real name Amber Levonchuck, was born to an African-American mother and a white father in Philadelphia. She began stripping at the age of 15 after her parents separated to help provide for her family.

Yep, she’s the pride of Philadelphia. The mayor offered Amber the key to the city, but she sold it to a crack addict who’s still trying to smoke it.

Cry, Eagles, Cry…

Regular readers know I have not watched an NFL game since 2016, but I do have an interest in the Philadelphia Eagles; namely I want them to lose every game they play. Yesterday, I got my wish. Enjoy the golf season, assholes.

There is “The Drive” or “The Ice Bowl” or Joe Montana to John Taylor, as examples, and the New Orleans Saints can now add a series that should garner attention for years.

Down 14-10 early in the third quarter, the Saints put together an 18-play, 92-yard masterpiece that consumed an eye-popping 11:29 off the clock to produce what eventually became the game-winning touchdown in a 20-14 win over the Philadelphia Eagles in the NFC Divisional Round.

“I was just told we gained 117 yards on that drive,” Brees said in his postgame news conference. “I’m not sure if that’s a record because of the penalties that kept setting us back. We went on an 117-yard drive to take the lead in the third quarter and really didn’t look back. That was the turning point in the game.”

The good news is the Eagles blew a 14-point lead. The better news is the white trash Eagles fans who infect this town will not see a repeat performance, and I will not have my days off canceled to protect people who despise me and my coworkers.

Truth be told, I spent twenty minutes looking for a writer who wasn’t an Eagles apologist. Dude, they were 9-7 and fell into the playoffs. Get over yourselves.

Oh, and since I am merciful, I do have something nice for Eagles fans below the fold…

Continue reading “Cry, Eagles, Cry…”