True Detective Stories

This post may be longer than usual, but believe me, it is a necessary action to expose this dumbass and his “I Don’t Give A F**k” attitude.

So Saturday we were cursed with two problems: we were exceedingly busy and there was a gun buy back program in our division. (The gun buy back story will be highlighted in a TDS soon.) Until then, back to the dumbest person on Planet Earth.

Diego the Idiot Detective has this feature where toward the end of the day, he decides he needs to leave the building. He’ll claim he needs to check video surveillance, interview a witness, or some other ridiculous lie. Diego does this because he thinks if he is out on the street, he will be skipped when a job comes in.

Nice try, butt-munch.

Diego decided to flee the building Saturday around 12pm, claiming he was checking for video at one of his crime scenes. He could have done so the two days prior, but because we were busy, he figured it was a great time to get away. About a half hour after he left, Diego received a call from a woman who claimed Diego called her to come in for an interview.

Classic F**king Diego: set up an appointment and make someone else conduct the interview.

After speaking with the witness, we realized this was no ordinary interview. Diego handled an armed robbery of a phone store the day before, and the witness Diego was supposed to be interviewing may also have been the getaway driver. I immediately called the dullard…

Continue reading “True Detective Stories”

Just Another Day In The NFL

Two fine, upstanding NFL players have been arrested for allegedly conducting an armed robbery during a Florida house party. DeAndre Baker of the New York Giants and Seattle Seahawks cornerback Quinton Dunbar turned themselves in Saturday.

NFL player DeAndre Baker turned himself in to authorities on Saturday on charges of armed robbery, according to jail records and his attorney.

Baker, a New York Giants cornerback, and Seattle Seahawks player Quinton Dunbar were accused of robbing guests at gunpoint at a house party near Miami on Wednesday, according to arrest warrants issued on Thursday by police in Miramar, Florida.

Online records showed Baker, 22, was booked into the Broward County Jail on four counts of armed robbery using a firearm and four counts of aggravated assault with a firearm. (H/T – RedneckGeezer)

While there are despicable thugs in every line of work, the NFL seems to have more than its fair share. If the evidence supports the victims’ story, I hope these two spend the rest of their lives in prison.

True Detective Stories

It’s always fun going to work during a snow day. We can usually dress down, the traffic is light, and for the most part, the animals stay in their cages. Of course, the wintry weather doesn’t stave off the phone calls, and did I catch a real doozy yesterday.

A man called the division and stated his cousin – I’m not sure if he meant his real cousin or his “play cousin” – was arrested for armed robbery and stealing a car. Natch, the man’s cousin didn’t do it, attends college, and was just turning his life around.

Any hoo, the man claimed his cousin was only a passenger in the stolen car, and was not involved in the robbery. The man claimed he had proof, but since the arrest was already processed there was nothing we could do.

Then he says this…

“The detective brought him up for an interview, but my cousin didn’t want to give up the guy who did the jobs.”

Well whose fault is that, slapnuts? It’s possible the cousin is a decent kid who got caught up in the wrong crowd, but his “Stop Snitching” attitude saddled him with two felony arrests, a trip to prison, and possibly expulsion from college. He’ll now graduate Summa Cum Laude from Cell Block D.