Austin Police Quitting In Droves

The city of Austin, Texas has a police problem. However, it’s not a problem for the police officers, because they’re the ones quitting at an alarming rate.

Texas’ woke capital, Austin, is in the midst of a policing crisis with over 300 vacancies and cops quitting because they feel disrespected.

“We’re right there with Portland and Seattle and San Francisco as being one of those places where if you’re at all conservative or in law enforcement, it’s become a hostile place,” Lt. Brian Moon, who retired last month, told The Post of the city he protected for 23 years.

It’s like I have said for a while; many police officers working in blue cities are doing the same thing. Conservatives are leaving more frequently, but leftists are also deciding to leave as well.

Another 77 officers are expected to retire before the end of March — on top of 264 existing vacancies, according to the Austin Police Association.

Austin Police Department’s staffing is so bad, 911 calls are being redirected to the 311 non-emergency number because there aren’t enough cops to solve crimes.

This is really bad for the citizens of Austin, but to be fair, most of the people in that city hate the police and despise conservatives. Good luck, Austin. You’re going to need it.

By the way, the blonde on the left above? I’d hit that straight into a third trimester.

Well, Rubbin’ Is Racin’

A driver captured footage of a road rage incident on U.S. Route 290 near Austin, Texas. The Infiniti driver was chasing a male after the male allegedly cut off the offender; then things got weird.

Reddit user u/DexFPV posted dashcam footage of an incident he was involved in. The incident came to a crescendo on East U.S. Route 290 near the interchange with State Highway 130. The video begins with the driver going through an intersection and then getting cut off by a black Infiniti G35. The driver attempts to accelerate away but is pursued by the Infiniti. Driving onto a toll highway also isn’t enough to deter the black sedan’s driver.

Moments later, the Infiniti driver cranks his rage up to eleven.

The driver increases his speed up to 98 mph but eventually backs off. The Infiniti driver pulls up alongside the dashcam driver with the driver’s side window open. Shockingly, the Infiniti driver has his arm held high out of the window, brandishing an ax.

I mean, really, who carries an ax in their car?

The black sedan speeds down the highway. Then, the G35 slowly moves over into the center lane behind another car. The Infiniti driver slams on the brakes, but it’s too late. The black sedan smashes into the rear of the other vehicle. The impact rips over the rear bumper off the third vehicle as it’s sent off the road and into a roll in a huge roadside ditch.

So the jagoff Infiniti driver gets away, the sedan driver strikes an innocent vehicle, and the innocent guy gets slammed into a ditch and rolls over. Yeah, I’m fairly certain Texas is off our retirement list.

By the way, you can see video of the incident at the link. It’s insane.

Massage Parlor Rubs Cops The Wrong Way

An Austin, Texas business is facing stiff fines after failing to clean their pipes.

The property manager for Jade Massage Therapy LLC contacted investigators Feb. 7 to report suspected prostitution at the business.

The property manager “became aware of a problem when an industrial waste disposal unit connecting the property to city sewer services became clogged and destroyed by hundreds of condoms,” arrest affidavits state.

Police launched an investigation that found the business was being advertised on a website that often solicits prostitution services and officers conducted a weekslong stakeout that involved pulling over two customers who left the massage parlor.

Police work is a dirty job, but we will do whatever it takes to make sure someone goes to the pokey.

Members of the Austin Police Department Human Trafficking Unit and members of the Criminal Conspiracy Unit executed a search warrant at the business March 22 and found Juan Wang, who owns the business with her husband, Joseph Emery, in a room with a nude man.

Wait a minute; one of the owners is named Juan Wang? Oh, that’s rich!

Hot For Teacher

Meet Haeli Noelle Wey; a woman who must have the most commonly misspelled name in American history. Haeli is not only crazy-stupid fine, but she is also responsible for molding young minds. I assume she does the molding with her lesson plans and her va-jay-jay.

Haeli Noelle Wey, 28, had been communicating with one of the victims through social media since the beginning of the current school year. The arrest affidavit listed a series of texts between Wey and the victim that alleged she invited the victim on a hike then asked him to delete the conversation from his phone.

The alleged incident with the second student occurred during the summer. The affidavit reportedly states that Wey invited the victim to her home, where they had sex. The alleged relationship lasted several months and authorities were notified after the victim told their parents. (H/T – AOSHQ)

I am always amazed by two things. First, how scorching hot these borderline pedo teachers always are, and second, how quickly these “victims” run to their parents afterward. Hey jackass, just because you’re tired of tappin’ dat ace, why would you ruin it for everyone else?

My Spanish teacher in high school was Miss Dwyer. She was probably in her mid-20’s when she taught me, and every time I walked into her room you could actually hear me get hard. I literally would have given my right arm to bang her, and if I ever had the opportunity, I would have taken that secret to the grave. I mean, I would smile every moment of every day, but I would say nothing.

As far as these idiot teenagers are concerned, I’d like to quote Samuel L. Jackson from Pulp Fiction, “Vincent, shut the f**k up!”