Ladies and gentlemen, I regret to inform you the whitest man in America has dropped out of the 2020 presidential race. Robert Francis O’Rourke has suspended his pathetic campaign, which means all our guns are safe… for the moment.
Former Democratic Texas Rep. Beto O’Rourke announced Friday that he was ending his presidential campaign. The former Texas senate candidate was initially considered a front-runner for his party’s presidential nomination, but saw his one-promising poll numbers quickly evaporate.
“Our campaign has been about seeing clearly, speaking honestly and acting decisively in the best interests of America,” O’Rourke wrote in a Medium post. “Though it is difficult to accept, it is clear to me now that this campaign does not have the means to move forward successfully. My service to the country will not be as a candidate or as the nominee.”
To be completely honest, I am surprised he stayed in the race this long. The man is pretty far to the left of Bernie Sanders, and openly claimed he would send law enforcement door-to-door to confiscate Americans’ guns. Even in 2019 America, that’s a bridge too far.
After losing to Ted Cruz, then going nowhere in a presidential primary, I’d like to think this is his last foray into politics… but I know better.