WTF California?

With all due respect to MelP and Mike AKA Proof, is your state out of its cotton pickin’ mind?

A California home that was destroyed down to its “bare bones” is now under contract with an offer reaching well over the original, $850,000 asking price.

The four bedroom, two bathroom, 2,395-square-foot dwelling is located in the city of Walnut Creek – roughly 1.5 hours from San Francisco.

“Bring your contractor, architect, and designer: this is more than a fixer and the potential is limited only by imagination,” read the listing for the single-family residence.

Despite its appearance, seller’s agent Melinda Byrne of Key Realty told Fox News that she expected the house to sell for the amount that it did being that it sits in a “gorgeous neighborhood,” she said.

So the residence has been burned to the studs, and some jackass decided this would be a great investment… for the asking price of close to a million dollars. Seriously, WTF?

Magnificent Men In Flying Machines

A California driver was headed down a highway in Yuba City, minding his own business, when he saw a vehicle jumping over an embankment and onto the highway. The incident was captured on dashcam video.

The ‘Fast and Furious’ crew’s got nothing on this driver … who is miraculously alive after her car flew through the air — nearly clipping power lines — and crashed back down on a highway.

The video was captured by the dash camera of another driver who had impeccable timing. Last Wednesday, they were driving on Highway 99 in Yuba City, CA … when suddenly a white compact vehicle came flying over an embankment!!!

It looked exactly like a scene out of ‘Dukes of Hazzard’ — but there’s was added danger from power lines!!! Yeah, the car appears to have threaded the needle, narrowly missing the lines as it flew, flipped and smashed down onto the highway.

I’m sure there’s a bizarre backstory to this, but I’m fairly certain I don’t want to hear about it. For the record, the officers claimed alcohol was not an issue, and the guy actually walked out of the hospital the same day. I’m guessing the guy was the impetus for Unbreakable.

You can see the video at the link. It’s certainly… interesting.

“When They’re Dead, They’re Just Hookers”

A major drug death trial is about to commence in West Hollywood. Ed Buck, a powerful political donor, and close friend of the Clinton Crime Organization, is being charged with the deaths of two male prostitutes after injecting them with methamphetamine.

Federal prosecutors want to ask potential jurors whether they or any friends or relatives ever had a drug problem, or whether any close friends or relatives have been “drugged unknowingly” or against their will.

“Have you had a close friend or relative die of a drug overdose?” is among questions on the government’s proposed list of juror questions filed late Tuesday in Los Angeles federal court.

I almost overdosed on Chick-Fil-A a few years ago, but I was sent to a recovery center. Sadly, it only served Boston Market. Pass.

Other questions during voir dire, or jury selection, expected to begin Tuesday, include whether “you have any strongly held personal beliefs or opinions regarding prostitution? Do you believe that any adult who wants to pay for sexual activity with another adult should be able to do so?”

No problems there. I’ve been paying for sex since I was a teenager!

Potential jurors also could be asked if they hold any strong personal beliefs or opinions regarding homelessness, as well as individuals who may have broken the law and are cooperating with law enforcement by testifying.

Considering the state of the country’s police departments, I can honestly say I couldn’t care less whether or not anyone cooperates with police. I do, however, care about Ed Buck’s fate, since I am sure he will be found not guilty, because powerful Democrats are almost always able to avoid jail time.

It’s Still Cuter Than Amy Schumer

A Pacific footballfish washed up on the California shore this week, freaking out bathers and scientists alike. The fish lives a mile under the surface, and has rarely been sighted.

A grotesque black fish which normally lives in complete darkness one-kilometre below the ocean’s surface has washed up on a California beach.

The 45-centimetre creature, identified as a female Pacific footballfish, was found on the shoreline of Crystal Cove State Park in Orange County.

In a Facebook post, the park said to see a footballfish is “very rare” and that it was unknown how or why it ended up on the shore.

Probably because it thought it was more talented than Colin Kaepernick.

Cali Has Two Million Unused Vaccines

While the state of California is battling an alarming number of daily Chinese Wuhan Virus deaths, there are two million vaccines sitting in offices, apparently unused.

While Californians are dying at a record rate from the coronavirus, with the number now reaching 525 per day, while the concomitant demand for vaccines to fight the virus soars, nearly two million doses of vaccines for the coronavirus are lying unused, “locked up in cold storage,” as the San Francisco Chronicle reports.

“California has among the lower rates of vaccine administration in the country, with only 38% of the 3.1 million doses delivered to the state actually being given so far — leaving close to 2 million doses apparently stored in freezers and awaiting recipients,” The Chronicle notes, adding that the state’s ineptitude in vaccinating its residents is “putting the nation’s largest state far behind West Virginia, the Dakotas and most other states in the proportion of population that has been vaccinated.”

California is, by far, the worst-run state in the union, in my opinion. I truly feel sorry for those of you who are forced to live in that communist shithole.

L.A. County Public Health Director Barbara Ferrer stated, “This disease is running rampant right now, and we continue to plead with residents, businesses and government, the community, to do all possible to stop the spread.”

Or, you know, the state could start vaccinating their at-risk citizens instead of watching the vaccines degenerate on some government drone’s shelf.

The Way Of The Gun

In a truly surprising move, California residents have purchased more than 110,000 firearms since the Chinese Wuhan Virus was delivered escaped.

A new study reveals that 110,000 Californians bought guns during the coronavirus pandemic, 43% for the first time — and the most common reason given was fear of “lawlessness.”

The study, carried out by the Violence Prevention Research Program at the University of California Davis, casts firearm purchases as a response to the “pandemic,” and concludes that COVID-19 “exacerbated persistent structural, economic, and social inequities in the conditions that contribute to violence and its consequences.”

The study reveals that 43% of the people who purchased firearms during the pandemic were first-time gun owners. The authors conclude that this reflects underlying inequalities in society — that “the coronavirus pandemic and efforts to lessen its spread have compounded the burden of violence-related harms.”

Um yeah, it’s the inequalities in society and not, say…

However, the authors appear to overlook another explanation — namely, the fact that violent riots were going on in California and the rest of the country during the period in which its online survey of 2,870 adults was taking place.

The irony here is even leftists were probably buying guns to save themselves against policies they universally support. They bought their guns and will still gleefully vote for Biden, Harris, etc.

Get Ready For California Reamin’

Leftist California governor Gavin Newsom said it will take months, not weeks, for the state’s economy to be reopened. Just when you thought the People’s Republic of California couldn’t get worse.

California Gov. Gavin Newsom on Tuesday offered some more clarity on how his state is planning to reopen its nonessential businesses, noting especially that movie theaters fall into a category that will likely take “months” to reopen.

During his daily coronavirus update, which was live-streamed on Facebook and Twitter, the governor unveiled four “stages” that businesses will each fall into. The first stage, which he said the state currently falls into, allows only essential businesses to stay open and is a period when the state only plans further business reinstatement…

So this dolt is going to run California’s economy into the ground, and stomp it into dust. But by all means, keep voting Democrat!

“Phase three” will see higher-risk workplaces like movie theaters, gyms, hair salons, nail salons, in-person religious services and sports without live audiences reopen. Newsom emphasized that the third stage is “months, not weeks” away.

The final and fourth phase will entail the reopening of concert venues, conventions, sports stadiums and larger entertainment venues, which he said will “take some time” to reopen.

Oh noes, I am going to be without the elite leftists of Hollywood AND overpaid sports stars? Whatever shall I do? I know… I think I’ll celebrate! You people will not be missed.

California Set To Screw Pr0n Stars

The People’s Republic of California is putting forth a bill which would force pr0n stars to be fingerprinted and to obtain work licenses for boinking people on camera.

Porn stars in California have blasted a bill proposed by two state Democrats which would require adult entertainers to be fingerprinted and obtain a work license before stripping off in front of the camera.

AB 2389 was introduced by Assembly Members Cristina Garcia and Lorena Gonzalez to the California Legislature last Tuesday in a bid to increase education and regulation in the X-rated industry.

Of course this legislation was penned by women, and both of these politicians look exactly as you would expect. I did the dirty work so you guys don’t have to lose your sight.

An initial draft of the bill proposed that each performer would pay for and complete training every three years, educating them on ‘reporting workplace injuries’, ‘how to avoid sexually transmitted diseases’ and ‘resources for assistance’.

So what, are these men and women going to dress in their Sunday best, sit inside a classroom for eight hours every year and learn how to screw properly? I’m fairly certain these performers are adept at reporting workplace injuries.

It’s not like Johnny Hardbody would fracture his penis and simply rub some dirt on it. Little Cherry Forever isn’t going to simply walk home after her uterus falls out. Give these people some credit!

Cliffhanger

A California woman woke up and decided she would take up rock climbing, and despite the fact she had no experience and no tools, she persisted.

This is a CBS news video from Altadena, California of a 69-year old woman being snatched by a helicopter rescuer just as she lets go of the cliff she’s been hanging on to. Obviously, this woman is not going to be bringing home any gold medals in cliffhanging. Also, as far as exercise goes I’m thinking maybe walking around the mall before the stores open might be more her speed.

At least the woman, who may or may not be MelP, didn’t fall to her doom.

The video is below the fold…

Continue reading “Cliffhanger”

Licker? I Hardly Know Her!

Meet Roberto Daniel Arroyo of California. Daniel gives window lickers a bad good name, because most window lickers have standards.

Police are trying to track down a man who spent three hours licking a doorbell at a California home. Surveillance cameras caught Roberto Daniel Arroyo in the act.

The Dungans said they were not home at the time, but their children were inside the house sleeping.

You know, if I had a wee bit too much whiskey – which knocks me on my arse – and I tried to lick a doorbell, I would have died from electrocution. This jackass licks one for three hours and nothing? Seriously, wake up, Darwin!