True Detective Stories

Oh my, where to begin with the idiocy.

So Friday seemed to be Idiot Day, and Diego the Idiot Detective wasn’t even the building. The first idiot was from the 666th District, and he did not disappoint. At all. In fact, the officer gave me the giggles with his dumbassery.

The officer called the division and said he found an unoccupied car which had blood inside the vehicle. The officer was so excited, you would have thought he found Jimmy Hoffa’s corpse. So the cop tells me about the blood inside the vehicle, and I effectively reply, “And?” The cop pauses, so I continued.

“Are there and bullet holes in the vehicle? Are there any shell casings outside the location, or anyone saying there was a shooting?” All three answers were no. The officer said his lieutenant wanted him to let us know, and I said, “Okay, but without any evidence of a crime, there’s not a lot we can do.” The officer finally relented, and because it was my last day before my days off, I threw this one out there. “Maybe it was a female driver and she was having her period.” The cop at least laughed…

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