Pretty Girl Has A Pretty Long Record

Meet Nicole Gregory of St. Petersburg, Flori-Duh.

Nicole has a few issues with narcotics, and after she was arrested for alleged possession of methamphetamine, she decided to save money for a lawyer. She did so by selling drugs.

Nicole Gregory, 28, was busted after a sheriff’s deputy spotted her dropping a bag that held four baggies containing the synthetic opioid. “The defendant did intend to sell said substance,” the investigator alleged.

After being collared on a St. Petersburg street, Gregory reportedly admitted that she “sells the drug for $10 per ‘bump.’” Gregory then claimed she was “selling the narcotics to make money for an attorney for a pending drug charge.”

According to court records, Gregory was arrested last month for selling methamphetamine to an undercover cop. In August, she was charged with possessing fentanyl and meth.

Okay, Nicole is not exactly a MENSA candidate, but she certainly is pretty. Nicole, maybe next time, sell your body instead of selling drugs. There’s less chance someone will lock you up for that.

Would You Like Sauerkraut With That?

The Phoenix Police Department recovered a ridiculous amount of methamphetamine and fentanyl this week, and for some reason the drugs were covered in mustard.

Phoenix PD say they recovered 11 pounds of meth, 53,000 M30 fentanyl pills, and $11,758 during an investigation Monday.

Police say while robbery detectives were investigating a home invasion at a house near 35th Avenue and Indian School Road. That’s when officers recovered the pills, the money and the mustard-covered meth.

No other details were released and no information regarding arrests has been made available yet.

The bad mews is all that mustard was waster. The good news is the people who were in possession of the narcotics will likely be murdered before week’s end.