Place Your Stewardess In The Overhead

The reason I try to fly Southwest Airlines? You never know what’s gonna fall in your lap.

Maybe that’s why passengers have to gate check their bags – the overhead compartments are filled with flight attendants.

A recent Southwest Airlines flight from Nashville to Philadelphia began on an odd note when a passenger spotted a flight attendant inside the plane’s overhead compartment.

According to a short video taken by passenger Veronica Lloyd, who was heading back home to Pennsylvania, the attendant can be seen resting on her side and stomach, with her feet hanging out of the compartment. While passengers are boarding, the airline employee rolls over on her stomach and seems to start talking, though the video cuts off.

It’s an odd place to join the Mile High Club, but good for her!

Pop Goes The Measles

An Israeli stewardess is now in a coma after she contracted measles in either Israel or New York City. Great work, anti-vaxxers. Really great work.

Israeli health officials said the 43-year-old El Al flight attendant now has encephalitis, an inflammation of the brain and complication of the potentially fatal virus — which she may have contracted in New York, Israel or on a flight between the two locations.

“She’s been in a deep coma for 10 days, and we’re now just hoping for the best,” said Dr. Itamar Grotto, associate director general of Israel’s Ministry of Health.

The woman, who had been healthy prior to contracting measles, is now on a respirator in an intensive care unit at a hospital in Kfar Saba, near Tel Aviv. She was admitted to Meir Medical Center after developing a fever on March 31.

The woman was vaccinated as a child but received only one dose, which is only about 93% effective. Two doses of the vaccine — which began being administered in the United States in 1989 — increases its effectiveness to about 97%, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

The article then goes on to effectively blame the victim, stating she only had one measles shot, instead of two. One shot is 93% effective, but apparently it is less effective when thousands of illegals flood our borders and bring in diseases we’ve previously eliminated.

But we can’t talk about that…

The Fugly American

A Taiwanese flight attendant probably wanted to jump out of the plane after being forced to clean a morbidly obese American passenger after he evacuated his bowels.

A 31-stone passenger forced flight attendants to strip him in a toilet and wipe his backside as he allegedly ‘moaned with pleasure’ during a long-haul flight.

However, the flight attendants’ discomfort then turned to humiliation when he allegedly began moaning in apparent pleasure as the chief attendant wiped his backside while wearing three pairs of latex gloves.

Dude, what the f**k is wrong with you?

Kuo, who was holding onto the passenger to keep in steady, recalled: ‘He said: “Oh, mmm, deeper, deeper,” and then accused my chief attendant of not properly cleaning his backside, requesting that she do it again.’

Kuo said the attendant repeated the action three times before leaving, at which point the passenger said: ‘You can pull my pants back up now.’

There is a photo of the flight attendant below the fold, and whatever her salary, she is ridiculously underpaid.

Continue reading “The Fugly American”