Let Bi-Gones Be Bi-Gones

Sofia Loren And Mamie Van DorenAttention single guys: if you think the dating pool is a hot mess now, wait until you read this little info nugget.

A new British study claims women – all women – are either gay or bisexual, but never straight. Wow, this completely explains pre-marriage love life.

Most women are either bisexual or gay but “never straight”, a study suggests. Research has found that though lesbians are much more attracted to the female form, most women who say they are straight are in fact aroused by videos of both naked men and naked women.

The study, led by Dr Gerulf Rieger from the Department of Psychology at the University of Essex, involved 345 women whose responses to being shown videos of naked men and women were analysed.

The results, which were based on elements such as whether their pupils dilated in response to sexual stimuli, showed that 82% of the women tested were aroused by both sexes. Meanwhile of the women who identified as straight, 74% were strongly sexually aroused by videos of both attractive men and attractive women.

While this is welcome news when thinking about someone like Giada de Laurentiis, it is less exciting when imagining Joy Behar.

I would appreciate it if the ladies of the O.K. Corral could set us guys straight, so to speak. Is this study a bunch of nonsense, or are we wasting our time coming on to you?