Caption Contest Winners

The Grandma’s Got A Gun Caption Contest is now over.

Top Five Entries:
5. The year after Grandma got run over by a reindeer, her theme song became “Won’t get fooled again”. – Mike AKA Proof
4. Somewhere a T-1000 has a box of cookies but no plasma rifle. – Veeshir
3. Food fights with grandma can get a bit crazy. – Cathy
2. Grandma Betty shows off her accessorizing skills learned over a lifetime, matching her red cotton top with her Westinghouse 2029 pulsed laser rifle. Looks like Betty’s all set for a night on what’s left of the town! – Mitchell O Strand

WINNER! – I paid full price for this lap dance, and you still have three minutes to gyrate. Now move! – Barry D.

Grandma Got Run Over By A Carjacker

Meet Jaquay Marlon Jean of North Miami, Flori-duh. Jaquay craves excitement, and he got it in spades after committing a carjacking and fleeing the scene with a grandmother and infant in the back seat.

A man attacked a woman during a stop at a gas station in Palm City, then drove away in her car with her mother and infant inside.

The carjacking happened Sunday afternoon at a Mobil gas station on State Road 714 as the family was returning to Miami after visiting Walt Disney World in Orlando, according to a Martin County Sheriff’s Office Facebook post.

The man pointed a gun at the driver and dragged her from the car. The grandmother, Joanne Segona, begged the carjacker to stop at another gas station, where he let them out.

“He was pointing the gun at the baby It was going to kill somebody. The only chance we had was to get out,” Segona said.

As you can see, this master criminal was on the run for almost twenty-four hours before being snatched by police. Congratulations on a job… done.

Grandma Got Run Over By A MOAB

The grandmother of leftist Rashida Tliab – the ugliest person ever to serve in Congress – asked her “god” to ruin President Trump after Clayface decided not to go see her in the make-believe territory of “Palestine.”

Democratic Michigan Rep. Rashida Tlaib’s grandmother had some harsh words for President Trump after Israel denied her granddaughter entry because it was allegedly discovered the group funding her trip had members with ties to terrorism.

“Trump tells me I should be happy Rashida is not coming. May God ruin him,” Muftia Tlaib told Reuters in an interview on Saturday.

Well Muftia – if that is your real name – your “god” already has a bad habit of ruining the lives of free people around the world, amirite??

Israel had originally granted Tlaib a humanitarian visa to visit her elderly grandmother, but the Michigan Representative turned it down and went on to claim she was being treated like a criminal and silenced.

So this despicable anti-Semitic piece of flotsam whined about how the Jooooos were keeping her out of Israel, then when they allowed her entry, sudden;y she doesn’t want to go? Hmm, it almost sounds like this was a publicity stunt all along.