True Detective Stories

It’s been a while since Diego the Idiot Detective graced the blog, but yesterday he popped up on the radar. A police officer brought in a gun possession arrest just after the shift began, and unfortunately, Diego was the assigned “detective.”

Firearms arrests are usually easy to process. You run the weapon through the system to find the owner, and check to see if the gun was previously stolen. Then you swab the firearm for DNA. Finally, you insert the information on a gun trace and send it downtown to the Firearms Investigation Unit (FIU).

It’s so easy that a teenager could literally process the job. Unfortunately, we had Diego doing it.

Diego swabbed the gun for DNA – although he has a habit it catching his own DNA on guns – and began the gun trace. The form is a fill-in-the-blanks formula, so if you miss something, the report will let you know. It is almost impossible to screw this up. Almost…

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