Hack And Black

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, your prayers have been answered. The two greatest politicians in American history will be teaming up to help Democratic candidates during the midterm elections.

Former President Barack Obama and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton are working on plans to campaign for Democrats in 2018, and Democrats worry they plan to change the direction of the Party. Aides to Obama told The Hill’s Amie Parnes he is looking to resurface on the national campaign stage. Parnes also reported Clinton is trying to sort out what role she might play in the midterms.

Although the pair bring a lot of fundraising firepower to a very crowded field of needy Democratic candidates, party insiders worry about who would control the party if either past candidate became too influential.

Thank. You. Jesus! Pairing Obama and Hillary together is a godsend. A feckless, pantywaist former president, and a mentally ill, compulsive liar whining about President Trump is a surefire way to ensure the GOP keeps both the Senate and the House.

Caption Contest Winners

The Harlem Ache Caption Contest has now concluded.

Top Five Entries:
5. “The pods for Bill and Hillary were in the last place she’d look for them…the kitchen!” – Mike AKA Proof
4. “Why yes, Bill and I do grow our own “herbs” just like you.” – Metoo
3. “This is not the White House I was promised.” – Cathy
2. “Yes, this is a very nice home (whispers to aid: find out who set this up), yes, nice plants (whispers to aid: NOW!) yes, nice kitchen (whispers: you got the name? good, set up an Arkancide!!!)” – MelP

WINNER! – WHAT HAPPENED??????? – DocRambo

The Woman Needs A Coughin’

Twice-failed presidential candidate Hillary Clinton delivered the commencement speech at Wellesley College – an institution which caters to women in comfortable shoes and their “longtime companions” – where she spent much more time coughing than talking.

Hillary Clinton struggled to speak shortly after beginning her speech at the Wellesley College commencement ceremony Friday.

A college official rushed to deliver her a lozenge and water bottle as she choked on her words. She credited her croaky delivery to allergies rather than emotions, which drew cheers and laughs from the crowd.

Yes, because when I see a corrupt Democrat politician suffering through severe health problems, it usually elicits giggles and applause.

Joe Biden States The Obvious

Six months after the presidential election, Joe Biden wants to warn us about Hillary Clinton.

Joe Biden has a reputation for saying what’s on his mind, and on Thursday night, he reportedly didn’t hold back at all about former Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton.

I never thought she was a great candidate. I thought I was a great candidate,” Biden reportedly told an audience of hedge fund managers at the annual SALT conference in Las Vegas.

What gave it away, Joe? Hillary’s irascible personality, her rampant corruption, or the brain damage? By the way, you were not a great candidate, either, jackass, and you are hardly a man of the people when you’re addressing hedge fund managers.

“No man or woman should announce for the presidency unless they genuinely believe that for the that moment in the nation’s history they are the most qualified person to deal with the issues facing the country,” Biden continued.

Funny, your former boss, King Putt, stated “there has never been a man or a woman – not me, not Bill, nobody – more qualified than Hillary Clinton to serve as president of the United States of America.” Could it be Barack Obama is simply a bullshitter, Joe?

The Clinton Crime Family Strikes Again

The Prime Minister of Bangladesh claims Hillary Clinton pressured her to help a major Clinton Foundation donor while Clinton was Secretary of State. Wow, I am shocked and appalled.

While secretary of state, Hillary Clinton made a personal call to pressure Bangladesh’s prime minister to aid a donor to her husband’s charitable foundation despite federal ethics laws that require government officials to recuse themselves from matters that could impact their spouse’s business.

The Office of Bangladesh Prime Minister Sheikh Hasina confirmed Mrs. Clinton called her office in March 2011 to demand that Dr. Muhammed Yunus, a 2006 Nobel Peace prize winner, be restored to his role as chairman of the country’s most famous microcredit bank, Grameen Bank. The bank’s nonprofit Grameen America, which Yunus chairs, has given between $100,000 and $250,000 to the Clinton Global Initiative. Grameen Research, which is chaired by Yunus, has donated between $25,000 and $50,000, according to the Clinton Foundation website.

“Former US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton telephoned Bangladesh Prime Minister Sheikh Hasina in March 2011 insisting her not to remove Dr. Muhammad Yunus from the post of Managing Director of Grameen Bank,” Deputy Press Secretary Md Nazrul Islam told Circa in an email.

The most disappointing aspect of the Trump administration is their unwillingness to investigate Hillary Clinton’s crimes, and the Clinton Foundation’s shady dealings.

The Need To Concede

Barack Obama reportedly demanded the Clinton campaign to concede the 2016 election; and he had to make the demand three times before Hillary took action.

A new book on the Clinton campaign contains the revelation that Clinton had to be pressured into conceding her loss on election night by President Barack Obama.

“POTUS doesn’t think it’s wise to drag this out,” White House political director David Simas is reported as saying to Robby Mook, Clinton’s campaign manager. The campaign did not concede at that point.

Later, President Obama himself called and told Clinton, “You need to concede.” The president then repeated the demand to Clinton campaign chairman John Podesta shortly thereafter.

Clinton still refused to make a concession speech until the next day, but remember, Hillary is a rational, mild-tempered woman who is fit to lead this country.

The Bitch Is Back!

What, you thought Hillary Clinton would just slink away into a vat of chocolate chip cookie dough?

Hillary Clinton said she was “ready to come out of the woods” during a St. Patrick’s Day speech on Friday night in Pennsylvania in front of an overflow crowd — an indication that she plans to shed the low profile she has kept since the election.

Mrs. Clinton, the presidential candidate and a former secretary of state, made the comments at the end of a talk she gave at a yearly St. Patrick’s Day celebration held by a women’s group in Scranton — in the northeast corner of a battleground state that made for one of her most surprising electoral losses in November.

“I’m like a lot of my friends right now. I have a hard time watching the news, I’ll confess,” she said, according to a video of the event. “I am ready to come out of the woods and to help shine a light on what is already happening around kitchen tables, at dinners like this.”

Yes, because if there is one thing America needs right now, it’s an unlikable, corrupt, twice-failed presidential candidate lecturing us on how we’re all so awful. Go away, Hillary; and take your dog-faced daughter with you.

Ready For Hillary… To Go Away

In her unending quest for relevancy, Hillary Clinton has expressed a desire to run for mayor of New York City. Unfortunately for the failed POTUS candidate, the Big Apple wants to see this worm stay home.

Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton didn’t perform well in the latest poll in the New York City mayor’s race, according to a new Rasmussen poll released Tuesday.

Fifty-eight percent of likely voters in the city don’t want Clinton to run again, compared to just 23 percent of voters who wanted the former presidential candidate to run. Nineteen percent of voters hadn’t yet made up their mind.

Clinton expressed interest in the race, but said she would only consider running if de Blasio didn’t enter the race for some reason.

Wow, when you’ve lost uber-liberal New York City…

Okay Hillary, maybe president or mayor isn’t your bag. I know, maybe you can vie to be crowned queen of the harpies?

What Voter Fraud?

Hillary Clinton ShruggingWhile the usual suspects from the #FakeNews sites poo-poo’d President Trump’s claims of voter fraud, educators at Old Dominion University concluded Hillary Clinton received almost a million votes from non-citizens.

But voter ID is racist, or something.

Hillary Clinton garnered more than 800,000 votes from noncitizens, an approximation far short of President Trump’s estimate of up to 5 million illegal voters but supportive of his charges of fraud.

Political scientist Jesse Richman of Old Dominion University in Norfolk, Virginia, has worked with colleagues to produce groundbreaking research on noncitizen voting, and this week he posted a blog in response to Mr. Trump’s assertion.

Based on national polling by a consortium of universities, a report by Mr. Richman said 6.4 percent of the estimated 20 million adult noncitizens in the U.S. voted in November. He extrapolated that that percentage would have added 834,381 net votes for Mrs. Clinton, who received about 2.8 million more votes than Mr. Trump.

Mr. Richman calculated that Mrs. Clinton would have collected 81 percent of noncitizen votes.

The Trump administration hinted they would conduct an investigation into election fraud, and it is certainly an idea whose time has come.