Make A Gun For The Border

President Trump is considering sending the U.S. military to protect the southern border; a move which is guaranteed to please most citizens and enrage the leftists.

The President’s comments appear to take aim at current US policy which requires border agents to catch then release family units who arrive at the border from noncontiguous countries. He also said he had spoken with Secretary of Defense James Mattis about the use of the military to guard the border.

In recent days, Trump has repeatedly tweeted about a caravan of illegal immigrants making their way from Honduras to the US border via Mexico. The President had threatened to end the NAFTA agreement if the Mexican government did not stop the caravan and to end U.S. aid to Honduras.

Personally I think this is a brilliant idea. Mexico and Central America has been giving us the immigration finger for far too long. It’s time to stop this madness, and since the GOP refuses to give the president his wall, Trump should use his power to station the military there.

Bottle Rocket

glass-coke-bottle

A Honduran man lost his penis after it became wedged inside the bottle he was boinking. Jesus Christ, have you people never even heard of Vaseline?

Doctors have amputated a man’s penis after it became stuck in a bottle he was using as a sex toy for four days.

A 50-year-old man arrived at a hospital in Honduras with a penis that was “black and decaying.” The man was trying to “relieve sexual frustration” because he did not have a wife or girlfriend.

The doctor revealed the man will never be able to have sex again following the operation, although he will be able to urinate after his urethra was moved. He added: “When you put your penis into a bottle it causes a constriction in the blood vessels of the penis and within four hours you can lose the penis.”

In fairness, the victim did nothing when his dingus started to rot, because he thought a black penis would make him more popular with the ladies.