There Are No Bones About It

I love Arizona – it’s one of my retirement destination finalists – but like every state, even Arizona has its share of morons. Morons who will do anything to escape rush hour traffic.

A 62-year-old man was cited in Arizona this week after trying to disguise a fake skeleton as a passenger just to use the HOV lane.

The Arizona Department of Public Safety says a trooper pulled over the man on Thursday after noticing he had placed a fake skeleton in the passenger’s front seat. The skeleton was sitting upright, wearing a hat and tied to the front seat.

Not for nothing, but the guy is 62 years old and living in Arizona. What are the chances this guy was rushing to work? So he likely did all this just to get where he needed to go a little faster. Well done, dumbass. Well done.

There Are Idiots In Texas?

2019 Ford Expedition Texas Edition Badge

When you really like a certain part of the country, it’s difficult to reconcile the fact some stone cold morons may live there. Such is apparently the case in Texas – who knew? – where an impatient dumbass almost got more than a few people killed.

To wit:

This is a video from Texas of some jackass in a Toyota Tundra who’s decided he’s tired of sitting in 10MPH traffic and drives over the pylons into the HOV lane, immediately getting rear-ended by a Ford F-150 that was doing near 70MPH (at least before that driver saw him), almost causing it to flip over the Jersey wall into oncoming traffic. What a dumbass.

For 1) if you have to drive over pylons to do something, they’re there for a reason and you know you’re not supposed to be doing it. And 2) HOV stands for High Occupancy Vehicle, meaning you have to have at least two (and sometimes three) people in the car to drive in the lane, not just a brain filled with enough stupid for six people.

Look, everyone has been stuck in traffic – apparently Texas traffic is awful – but sane people like me wait it out while calling every driver around them c-words and wishing they die in a fire. See? I’m reasonable.

You can see the idiocy below the fold…