True Detective Stories

I hate my job.

Yes, I realize I write that once every week or so, but it is now absolutely true. I hate this job, I hate this department, and I especially hate entitled people who believe they deserve “special” service because they’re former law enforcement.

Yesterday I was sitting at my desk entering jobs, when a woman and her son approached the window and demanded to speak with a detective. I asked them if they knew which detective was handling their case, and the mother immediately replied with a condescending “No.” I then asked if they had a report number so I could help them find their assigned investigator, and I receive another condescending “No.” Again. she then told me they hadn’t made a police report yet.

Now I’m starting to get annoyed, but I was not going to let this woman get the best of me. “You’ll need to make a police report first, so it can be assigned to a detective-”

The woman then turned her back on me, pulled out her cellphone and started to make a phone call. Finally fed up with these shenanigans, I returned to my desk…

Continue reading “True Detective Stories”

True Detective Stories

Homer Simpson Drunk And DisorderlyThis week, our captain’s office sent out an email regarding the annual Christmas party. (Yes, police stations hold Christmas parties, and officers rarely fire off their guns in drunken celebrations.)

In my division, the Christmas party is primarily used to honor retiring personnel, or detectives who hit a major milestone. At last years soirĂ©e, I received a plaque for twenty years of service. It’s always a nice event, so I was looking forward to going this year as well.

Then I read the email.

The party is scheduled for Sunday, December 27th. Yes, the Christmas party is scheduled after Christmas. Worse still, it is being held on a Sunday night, from 8pm to midnight. Why is this a problem? Because most of us will have to be in court Monday morning by 8am.

Why the frak would anyone think holding a Christmas party on a Sunday night would be a good idea? There will be officers who have too good a time at this thing, then have to call out drunk sick from court the next day. This is a terrible, terrible idea.

But wait, there’s more!

Continue reading “True Detective Stories”