The Tall Man Was Not Pleased

Meet Jose Aramburo Molina Jr. of Phoenix, Arizona. Jose is a partying kind of guy, so nothing says party hearty than finding the keys to a mortuary van and taking it on a joyride.

Authorities received a call from South Mountain Mortuary just before 1 p.m. Wednesday. Employees had left the vehicle alone for a short time while it was running. Officers then spotted a van matching the description of the mortuary vehicle in the area of 32nd Street and Roeser Road. Jose Aramburo Molina Jr. was located a short time later. Police said he matched witness descriptions and surveillance video of the suspect.

I mean, does this guy look like he would steal a mortuary van?

According to Molina’s court paperwork, he was found with five blue pills, which officers believed to be fentanyl, along with several other drugs. Police also found a key fob for the stolen van, which authorities then used to unlock the vehicle. At the scene, an eyewitness identified Molina. Authorities also confirmed two bodies were inside.

After being arrested by the officers, Jose was heard saying, “Wow, I am dead tired.”