An Explosive Development

A Washington, D.C. man was killed after he decided to place bottle rockets on his head and lit them during an Independence Day celebration.

Metropolitan Police released details Sunday afternoon about a man who died in a fireworks accident in Northwest Washington Friday night.

Investigators have identified the victim as 33-year-old Jose Tony Alvarez Umanzor of Northwest. Umanzor was holding a commercially made mortar firework above his head when the base of the object ejected downward after it was ignited.

Idiot, everyone knows you never launch fireworks off your skull without first placing flex tape on your melon. I mean, Phil Swift cut that boat in half and was cruiing on a lake minutes later!