Chortles From Bortles

Meet Joseph Horton, America’s most incompetent thief. Naturally, he resides in Florida, but is probably not a Jacksonville Jaguars fan.

Joseph Horton was spotted walking around Linder’s house by Jaguars guard Christopher Reed. At first, Linder said he did not think anything of Horton in his home due to the large amount of people in the house for a party.

Horton, whose address is also listed as Hopson Road, was arrested after he was spotted inside [NFL quarterback Blake] Bortles’ truck, which was parked at Linder’s house. Bortles’ truck was unlocked with the keys and wallet inside.

Incredibly, Horton was not able to steal Bortles’ truck, wallet, or keys; probably because he was born and raised in Florida.