Caption Contest Winners

The Kim Jong-Un Towers Caption Contest is now over.

Top Five Entries:
5. Hide our WMD in this apartment building before Han Blix send another sternly worded letter! He seem selious this time! – TXNick
4. I have outlawed the color blue… I will invent a new color to replace it in ten minutes. – Sully
3. Here, here is where we put gallows. – Art
2. If Biden comes to visit, we put him here: five story penthouse, no elevator. – Mike AKA Proof

WINNER! – “Look, there’s Waldo!” – John DuMond

Weekend Caption Contest

The Kim Jong-Un Towers Caption Contest
(Source: Reuters)

Caption this photo in the comments section. The winners will be posted on Monday, April 5th.

Original Caption: North Korean leader Kim Jong Un visits the construction site for a residential district of terraced apartment buildings on the bank of the River Pothong, in North Korea. KCNA via REUTERS

Someone’s Gettin’ Lucky

It’s difficult finding love when you’re a tip pot dictator in the worst country on the planet. Kim Jong-Un is so ronery, and he has so much love to give.

The good news is there’s a new Dragon Lady in town, and her name is Hyon Song-wol.

The ongoing drama of North Korea’s ruling dynasty has taken another twist with reports of a mystery power shift in the supreme leader’s Kim Jong-un inner circle. It appears his wife and ambitious sister have been pushed out by a former lover – one of the country’s leading pop stars.

They’re dead.

The two other women in Kim’s life, his wife, Ri Sol-ju and his sister Kim Yo-jong, seem to have been sidelined as the glamorous Hyon Song-wol is increasingly seen at his side.

They’re. Dead.

Ri Sol-ju, 31, has not been seen in public since the new year. Kim Yo-jong has disappeared from public view before, raising speculation that there might have been a falling-out between the pair, but she has bounced back without any acknowledgement of her absence.

FOR THE LAST TIME, THEY’RE DEAD!

Hyon Song-wol is the leader of The Moranbong Band – also known as Moran Hill Orchestra.

Eh, I mean she isn’t ugly. I’m sure she would look much better with some makeup, lingerie, and lying on my bed, but hey, who am I to argue? I wish the happy couple the best, and mourn her passing the second she displeases Kim Jong-Un.

Caption Contest Winners

The It Takes A Pillage Caption Contest is now over.

Top Five Entries:
5. MelP’s video.
4. This child won the contest to ride our next ballistic missile into space with his essay titled “I’ll do anything to get out of North Korea!” – Dalek
3. Kim Jong Un declares himself the worlds greatest ventriloquist, his dummy has everyone executed for calling him a dummy… – Sully
2. Chairman Kim takes a queue from US Democrat front runner Joe Biden’s playbook. – Ingineer66

WINNER! – Finally! I found somebody shorter than I am! – Mike AKA Proof

Weekend Caption Contest

It Takes A Pillage Caption Contest
(Source: Reuters)

Caption this photo in the comments section. The winners will be posted on Monday, June 10th.

Original Caption: North Korean leader Kim Jong Un holds up a child as he watches a performance given by amateur art groups of the wives of officers of units of the Korean People’s Army (KPA) selected in the seventh round of the second-term contest of art groups of KPA officers’ wives, North Korea. KCNA/via REUTERS

Trump, Kim Agree To Denuclearization

President Trump and North Korean despot Kim Jong Un have agreed to denuclearize the Korean peninsula. The agreement is a huge win for the president, the United States, and the world.

Clasping hands and forecasting future peace, President Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un committed Tuesday to “complete denuclearization” of the Korean Peninsula during the first meeting in history between a sitting U.S. president and a North Korean leader. Yet as Trump toasted the summit’s results, he faced mounting questions about whether he got too little and gave away too much — including an agreement to halt U.S. military exercises with treaty ally South Korea.

Both leaders expressed optimism throughout roughly five hours of talks, with Trump thanking Kim afterward “for taking the first bold step toward a bright new future for his people.” Kim, for his part, said the leaders had “decided to leave the past behind” and promised: “The world will see a major change.”

While the president said he believes Kim is acting in good faith, he also stated there is a chance the agreement could crumble. For now, the president is proceeding with cautious optimism.

Oh, and that sound you hear is the leftist media weeping into their hands.

Caption Contest Winners

The Hello Pity Caption Contest has now concluded.

Top Five Entries:
5. Are you sure this is the same one Barack used when he rode that bicycle? – MelP
4. Yes! Yes! This will go with the pink and the purple thong! – Cathy
3. Oh, It’s a present from Pres. Trump! It says “pull pin and put on”. That’s so nice! – William
2. Kim is pleased with his newly designed nuclear “football”. – Proof

WINNER! – “Herro kitty?” – Toothy