You Damned Dirty Apes!

Well, we survived smallpox, polio, disco, and the Chinese Wuhan Virus, but apparently we are not out of the jungle yet. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, may I present to you the newest viral fad… monkeypox.

Health officials have confirmed that there are now three cases of monkeypox in the UK – but what are the symptoms of this virus to look out for?

The monkeypox virus is a member of the same family of viruses as smallpox. However, it is far less severe and experts say chances of infection are low. It is usually found in remote parts of central and west Africa near tropical rainforests.

So far there have been two confirmed cases in north Wales and one in Liverpool in north-west England.

One virologist claimed the worst side effects include sitting in a barrel with other infected patients, jumping on luggage, and banging cymbals together. If you have these symptoms, see a doctor a.s.a.p.