A Flori-Duh man was arrested after he was spotted lying sans pantaloons in someone’s driveway while pleasuring himself with a pickle.
You’d think the pickle juice would burn, but I guess this clown is used to it be now.
Eric Detiege, 47, of Tampa, was charged Sunday with exposure of sexual organs for the unappetizing display, according to the arrest affidavit obtained by the outlet. The arresting officer was at the time responding to reports of a suspicious person.
He ultimately found Detiege on private premises “lying flat on his back, no pants or undergarments on his bottom half,” according to the document.
This may shock you, but Mr. Detiege looks exactly as you would expect.
Meet Eric Detiege of Tampa, Flori-Duh.
Eric likes having fun in the great outdoors, especially when he can prance around the (literal) trailer park holding his Johnson and a spicy pickle. I really wish I was making that up.
As memorialized in an arrest affidavit, Detiege, naked from the waist down, had his penis in one hand and “a large uneaten pickle in his other hand.” Deputy Feijoo reported that Detiege was “using the pickle to penetrate his rectum while he was masturbating.”
Pictured above, Detiege was arrested for exposure of sexual organs, a misdemeanor, and booked into the Pinellas County jail. He was released after posting $150 bond, but was back behind bars a week later after getting arrested on a felony theft charge for stealing Red Bull and skinny jeans from a Walmart.
Hmm, I wonder if the skinny jeans had a pocket large enough to hold a pickle?