Sweet Surrender

The NFl, not content to simply lose their fans and their ratings, has decided to strongarm their owners into donating $100 million to player-endorsed charities.

They do know it is not charity if it’s forced, right?

The NFL’s sellout to their anthem-protesting players is starting to look a lot more like a buyout. According to ESPN, the league will offer nearly $100 million to causes designed to promote “social justice change.”

In a move unlike anything seen from a major American sports league, the league will offer the money in hopes that it will end the ratings-killing protest movement begun by Colin Kaepernick in the preseason of 2016.

According to ESPN: National funding would be allocated accordingly: 25 percent to the United Negro College Fund, 25 percent to Dream Corps and 50 percent to the Players Coalition, which has filed 501(c)(3) and 501(c)(4) paperwork for nonprofit status as a fiscally sponsored project. This week, the coalition hired the Hopewell Fund to oversee and advise the group, which hopes to work with grassroots and nonprofit organizations in its areas of focus.

There is no doubt in my mind the NFL will be funnelling some of this money to the Black Lives Matter terror group. It won’t be listed on the press release, but I’ll bet my house it’s on the list. F**k the NFL, and f**k their social justice warrioring.

Just The Tip…

Equipay AppAttention social justice warriors! A new phone app is being developed to make sure your privileged friends pay more for a split bill than your oppressed pals. Equipay is just the thing for SJWs like Emily Ratajkowski; The Hero of Black America.

Equipay is a new app developed last week for San Francisco’s Comedy Hack Day (where it took first prize). The app aspires to split dinner bills more fairly through a process that creator Luna Malbroux dubs “affirmative fractions.”

Instead of splitting a dinner bill equally, Equipay uses Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS) data regarding the average income of various racial and gender groups and splits the bill based on income levels. On a sample $350 bill for five people, the app forced the most privileged person (apparently an Asian male) to pay $89, while a less privileged black woman was assigned a bill of just $51.

I actually embrace this idea, because as it stands, I usually pay the entire bill when I eat with my coworkers. Sure, it’s steep, but it’s the only time they invite the White Devil to dinner.