Bad Times At The El Starbucks

An argument outside a Florida Starbucks ended with one man dead and the other charged for the alleged murder. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the coffee isn’t that great, people!

A witness told police that Justin Boersma cut off a man in line at the drive-thru, so the other man got out of his truck, started banging on Boersma’s window, and ripped the door handle off, according to an arrest report obtained by the Orlando Sentinel.

I can understand the man’s anger, but honestly, was it worth it to confront this jackass? Scream inside your car and flip him the bird, but this isn’t the America where we grew up. Americans kill people if you give them a sideways glance nowadays.

As the other man started walking back to his truck, Boersma got out of his car and fatally shot him.

Boersma may have had a (weak) case if he shot the man while we was banging on the window. Getting out and shooting the man as he walked back to his vehicle? Yeah, that’s a cut-and-dry homicide.

The Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office said that when deputies arrived at the scene, the victim was sitting in his car suffering from gunshot wounds and was transported to a local hospital where he was pronounced dead. Samuel Rossetti, 31, has been identified as the man who was shot and killed.

Another man lost over a senseless act. And for what? Uncontrollable anger? Humanity is doomed.

Howard The Cuck

Leftist former Starbucks head Howard Schultz has decided he wants to ruin the country like he ruined his business. Namely, he’s running for president in 2020.

These days, the difference between the parties is starker than it’s ever been in modern times. Yet here comes Howard Schultz, a billionaire who feels that he might be the answer to American politics.

Schultz, the former Starbucks CEO, says in a 60 Minutes interview already recorded but airing on Sunday that he is thinking very seriously about a presidential run—but he stops short of a full announcement.

He makes clear, however, that if he moves forward, he will do so as an independent.

Oh Cthulhu, make this happen and I will build many temples in your honor.

Already top Democratic operatives working for presidential candidates and beyond say they’re worried that the only thing he’ll accomplish is making sure Donald Trump gets reelected.

Leftist Democrats – but I repeat myself – destroyed Schultz in Twitter after his announcement, and Schultz reportedly responded, “I’m not running for president of Twitter.” It’s that kind of moxie which will lure Democrat voters… and sweep President Trump into a second term.

Gimme A Cafe Pottay

Starbucks, the nation’s most woke organization, is now reportedly “clarifying” its restroom policy after being forced to allow the tired, poor, and wretched refuse use their terlets.

Starbucks Corp. tried to dig itself out of controversy Monday by attempting to clarify a policy toward nonpaying guests that generated an onslaught of weekend criticism.

The Seattle-based retailer on Saturday had said it would allow all guests in its U.S. company-owned stores to use its cafes, including its restrooms, whether or not they make a purchase. That announcement, which attracted some support, also drew complaints that cafes wouldn’t have enough seats for paying customers and would turn into homeless shelters and drug havens.

Who could have possibly seen this coming… besides every clear-thinking person in America?

On Monday, Starbucks revealed more about the policy, telling The Wall Street Journal that employees now have detailed instructions on what to do if someone is behaving in a disruptive manner, such as smoking, using drugs or alcohol, using restrooms improperly or sleeping.

Wait, what? You will allow non-paying customers to use your restrooms, but if they cause a disturbance – which is open to interpretation – you’ll narc them out? That doesn’t seem very progressive.

I rarely show pride for my city, but I am tickled pink Philadelphia played a substantial role in Starbucks’ oncoming ruin.

Selfish Man Impugns Upright Corporation

When I am stressed and feeling down, nothing warms my heart than stopping by my local Starbucks coffee shop. My favorite barista, Melanie, is a pansexual socialist working her way toward a master’s degree in womyn’s studies. She always makes my coffee how I like my women – black, bitter, and preferably fair trade. It truly pains me to see her company receiving negative press. Truly.

Just two weeks before Starbucks is set to close thousands of locations for “racial-bias education,” for its employees, the coffee company is once again facing scrutiny after a barista at a store in La Cañada Flintridge, California, targeted a Hispanic customer with a racial slur.

Pedro, who asked not to be identified by his last name, ordered two coffees from the cafe and received his order with the word “beaner” on both cups in place of his name, he told NBC4’s sister station, Telemundo 52.

“It’s an offensive word used towards Latinos,” he said.

Actually Pedro, if that is your real name, “Beaner” describes the millions of Starbucks customers who simply adore their special coffee beans. I’m a beaner, and my friends are beaners. To attack a fine, upstanding corporation like Starbucks seems like a pathetic attempt at self-promotion. Frankly, it’s sad.

Please pay no mind to the Pedros of the world. Starbucks is a beacon of virtue in a less virtuous world.

Caption Contest Winners

The I Like My Coffee Black Caption Contest is now over. Every single entry was fantastic. Well done!

Top Five Entries:
5. “How do you think I take my coffee….BLACK, MOTHER F****R!!!!!” – Kevin
4. Guy on left: “CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE!”
Guy on right: *discreetly checks holster*
3. Mike’s Photoshop.
2. “What do we want!!! A grande extra hot soy with extra foam, split shot with a half squirt of sugar-free vanilla and a half squirt of sugar-free cinnamon, a half packet of splenda, oh and put that in a venti cup and fill up the “room” with extra whipped cream with caramel and chocolate sauce drizzled on top. 5 shot venti, 2/5th decaf, ristretto shot, 1 pump Vanilla, 1 pump Hazelnut, breve,1 sugar in the raw, with whip, caramel drizzle on top, free poured, 4 pump mocha. When do we want it!!!” – Sully

WINNER! – Zach stood quietly and contemplated the delicious irony of his degree in African American Studies. – Jim

Weekend Caption Contest

I Like My Coffee Black Caption Contest
(Source: ABC News via AP)

Caption this photo in the comments section. The winners will be posted on Monday, April 23rd.

Original Caption: Local Black Lives Matter activist Asa Khalif, left, stands inside a Starbucks, Sunday April 15, 2018, demanding the firing of the manager who called police resulting the arrest of two black men on Thursday. The arrests were captured on video that quickly gained traction on social media. (AP)

Wake Up And Quell The Coffee

starbucks-spit-coffeeA Stockton, CA police officer received a special kind of cream in his Starbucks coffee this week, if you believe the animals who infest Black Lives Matter.

The “Stockton Police Department, Corruption Reporting Page” on Facebook posted a picture of a man and his family with a message that reads, “We are happy to report that today this officer from the Stockton Police Department got to have coffee at Starbucks…served with a side of spit,” adding, “They even gave it to him with a smile and a nice comment.”

The Stockton Police Department tells FOX40 they were called out to investigate the incident at the Starbucks Wednesday night. A police spokesperson said they found no evidence that an employee spit in the officer’s coffee.

The Black Lives Matter Stockton chapter claims the post is 100 percent true. They said a barista who wants to remain anonymous spit in the officer’s coffee because they were upset. They said a family member had a problem with the officer in the post and they also mentioned their complaints regarding race related issues to the department are not being taken seriously.

The irony of this particular incident is Stockton officers will stop trusting Starbucks employees – especially the African-American ones. So these BLM terrorists are sabotaging all the “progress” they claim to be working toward.