Florida Man Makes One Hell Of A Meth

Meet Thomas Eugene Colucci of Spring Hill, Flori-Duh.

Thomas was worried about the authenticity of his recently-purchased methamphetamine, so he called a professional to his home to see if the meth was legitimate.

Hernando County Sheriff’s deputies were dispatched to 1463 Mariner Boulevard in Spring Hill Thursday afternoon after a resident in the home called 9-1-1 to request that a deputy be dispatched to “test the methamphetamine” he had recently purchased.

Wow, and I thought Philly criminals were stupid.

Upon arrival, deputies met with Thomas Eugene Colucci. Colucci told deputies he had recently purchased methamphetamine from a male he met in a local bar, and after having used a bit of it, believed it was actually bath salts.

Colucci went on to tell deputies he was an experienced drug user, having used methamphetamine in the past, and “knew what it should feel like.” Colucci produced two small baggies, each containing a white crystal-like substance, and handed them over to the deputy. The substance Colucci had recently purchased did not provide the expected sensation, hence the call to 9-1-1. (H/T – Al)

The officer then tested the drugs, and declared, “That’s good sh*t.” Okay, not really. The deputy arrested Colucci and dragged him off to jail.